Occupation jokes
What do a male pornstar and an emo have in common?
They are both hung.
My dad is now a milkman.
Now I have over 50 brothers and sisters.
I'm looking for the bartender.
Person named Bart:
A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar.
The bartender looks at them and says, “What is this – a joke?”
Do you know why Daddy never comes back to get the milk? Because he’s the milkman.
Memes
got my liscence
I did a ton of work, a skele-ton.
My stepdad took me to work, and he told me I could climb trees.
I woke up in a hospital. Wait, did I mention that my stepdad was a lumberjack?
Why doesn't the pirate go to the strip club?
Because he has ALL of the booty!
Why did the man cut down the tree? Because it was there. 👨🪚🌲
Why didn't the man cut down the tree? Because it wasn't there. 😕🪚!?️
Why did the tree cut down the man? Because it was a bad tree. 🌲🪚😮
What do you call a Fuhrer who's also a fitness coach?
Adolf Fit-ler.
Today I was asked what I wanted to be, and I said I wanted to be a pinata because I want to be hanged.
Bob the builder took one look at you and said, "Nah, I can’t fix that!"
What fell out of the tree first, the apple or the emo?
The apple, the emo was caught by the rope.
What type of doctor is Doctor Pepper?
A fizzician.
"I work with animals," the man said to his date.
His date said, "I love a man who works with animals. What job is it for the animal?"
"I am a butcher," said the man.
Why do potatoes make good detectives?
Because they keep their eyes peeled!
Why did the actor fall through the floor?
He was just going through a stage!
A lumberjack goes to a person's house.
Then he realized the tree was too big and was stumped and had to leaf.
What do you call a pig that does karate?
A pork chop!
Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floorboard?
Don't worry, he was just going through a stage.