Why is the mermaid so dirty?
Because she is a maid, mer-maid!
My aunt worked as a human cannonball.
I'm not sure if she was good at it until she got fired.
What do you call a rapper who works at the BANK?
Lil Teller.
What do a male pornstar and an emo have in common?
They are both hung.
My stepdad took me to work, and he told me I could climb trees.
I woke up in a hospital. Wait, did I mention that my stepdad was a lumberjack?
Why doesn't the pirate go to the strip club?
Because he has ALL of the booty!
Do you know why Daddy never comes back to get the milk? Because he’s the milkman.
Why did the man cut down the tree? Because it was there. 👨🪚🌲
Why didn't the man cut down the tree? Because it wasn't there. 😕🪚!?️
Why did the tree cut down the man? Because it was a bad tree. 🌲🪚😮
Bob the builder took one look at you and said, "Nah, I can’t fix that!"
After an unsuccessful harvest, why did the farmer decide to try a career in music?
Because he had a ton of sick beets.
A genealogist looks at the family tree.
A gynecologist looks up the family bush.
What does a gynecologist and delivery driver have in common?
Whenever they’re hungry, they can just scrape a little cheese off the top of the box.
I'm looking for the bartender.
Person named Bart:
My dad is now a milkman.
Now I have over 50 brothers and sisters.
Today I was asked what I wanted to be, and I said I wanted to be a pinata because I want to be hanged.
Why did the mailman come to the house?
To come back with the milk.
First date be like:
Me: I work with animals every day.
Her: Oh, how sweet! What is it exactly that you do with them?
Me: I'm a butcher.
What type of doctor is Doctor Pepper?
A fizzician.
Why do potatoes make good detectives?
Because they keep their eyes peeled!
Why did the actor fall through the floor?
He was just going through a stage!
