Nutrition jokes

Which nut is the worst for your diet?

Donuts.

Milk makes you tall, right?

Well how did you get tall if your dad didn't come back with the milk?

What does Aaron eat for breakfast? Food.

I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that’s just nuts.

What's the difference between boogers and broccoli?

Kids won't eat the broccoli.

I don’t know why I go to the gym. Being healthy is dying as fast as possible, and I really want to speed that shit up.

Bean.

Never eat more than you can lift.

What's the difference between a baby and a cooked chicken?

Several hundred calories.

We must start a propaganda for baked beans.

Why I can’t be skinny? I hurt myself for fatting. - Jenny

Hello please I want gain wait. - Jenny year later.

Why can't orphans eat Doritos? Because it's family size.

What is the best whey to make friends with an American boy, you bunch?

What’s the worst part about eating vegetables? Putting them back in the wheelchair.

What is the difference between a small child and a watermelon?

One I eat on the daily and the other is a watermelon.

What do kids call a balanced meal?

A hamburger in each hand! XD XD XD XD

I didn’t know if she was anorexic or not, so I tossed her an onion ring to see if she would eat it or use it as a hula hoop.

Why did the vegetable go to jail?

He kaled a man and stole a 9-carat gold bar.

You're so skinny, you can hula-hoop with Fruit Loops!

Why didn't the orange go to the doctor?

Because he had vitamin C.