Nutrition jokes
Why does my mum eat carrots?
I keep getting ads about belly fat.
Once I ate a table... it was food consuming.
You're so skinny, you can hula-hoop with Fruit Loops!
Jamal had 75 candy bars. He ate 65. What does he have now?
Diabetes.
Why didn't the orange go to the doctor?
Because he had vitamin C.
A fat man coming in the store.
Waiter: Oh god, not again :|
Fat man: Hi, I would like three fries and 19 burgers.
Waiter: Sorry sir, you will get the owner's store out of stock on food. Can I get you a salad instead?
Fat man: Oh sorry, but I'm the owner, and I have a lot of stocks. For the record, you should get yourself my order. You're skinny af, girl. You trying to be a stick or something?
What has two wheels and goes really fast?
A vegetable down a hill.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch some chips and sweets.
No, he can't keep his heart rate down, and she's got diabetes.
What do you call a food fight that's been going on for years?
A war of nutrition.
Why can’t orphans eat cereal?
It says, "Family size."
What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
Why is there no medication in Africa?
Because doctors advised, "You don't take it on an empty stomach."
How many potatoes to feed the elephant?
Yo mama so fat if she turned into food, she could solve world hunger.
What is Ronaldo's favorite fruit?
Oranges because they have vitamin C.
What did the peanut say to the cashew after their argument?
If Jonny ate 29 out of 30 chocolate bars what would he have? Diabetus. Jonny would have diabetus.
Why did the tomato blush? Because it saw the salad dressing!
What do you get if you do not eat? Dry.