Nutrition jokes
Why does my mum eat carrots?
Once I ate a table... it was food consuming.
I keep getting ads about belly fat.
Jamal had 75 candy bars. He ate 65. What does he have now?
Diabetes.
A fat man coming in the store.
Waiter: Oh god, not again :|
Fat man: Hi, I would like three fries and 19 burgers.
Waiter: Sorry sir, you will get the owner's store out of stock on food. Can I get you a salad instead?
Fat man: Oh sorry, but I'm the owner, and I have a lot of stocks. For the record, you should get yourself my order. You're skinny af, girl. You trying to be a stick or something?
Memes
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch some chips and sweets.
No, he can't keep his heart rate down, and she's got diabetes.
What has two wheels and goes really fast?
A vegetable down a hill.
Why can’t orphans eat cereal?
It says, "Family size."
What do you call a food fight that's been going on for years?
A war of nutrition.
What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
What is Ronaldo's favorite fruit?
Oranges because they have vitamin C.
Yo mama so fat if she turned into food, she could solve world hunger.
How many potatoes to feed the elephant?
Why did the tomato blush? Because it saw the salad dressing!
If Jonny ate 29 out of 30 chocolate bars what would he have? Diabetus. Jonny would have diabetus.
What did the peanut say to the cashew after their argument?
If a tomato is a fruit, is ketchup a smoothie?
I asked my teacher if I needed to be in the special ED class, but she said I don’t eat enough vegetables.
What's the difference between boogers and broccoli?
Kids won't eat the broccoli.
What do you get if you do not eat? Dry.