Nut jokes

What do you call a man with farts?

DEEZ NUTS!

Q: Sex is great, only your mate can sometimes be a little nuts!

(I am still a single young virgin.)

A pirate walks into a tavern with a pirate ship attached to his nutty wuttys. It's driving me nuts!

A troll proceeds to pull out a desert eagle and shoot the pirate in the face. He makes a poggers face and says, "Problem??"

I have to call Bovfa. What's Bovfa? Bovfa deez nuts fit in your mouth.

What is the difference between a human and a can?

A human can walk and a can cannot walk.

A nut told me to eat him, so I did, but something weird happened. I turned into a nut, and when I poop, there were eggs there.

Who's Joe?

Joe Mama sucks my fat nuts, bitch!

Me: Hey, I have candy.

Kid: Right next to me, can I have some?

Me: Some of deez nuts.

Why are baby elephants so smart? They hang out with friends!

Why is my butt wet? I forgot.

Ccddfftggfdrrttty.

Danny, your mum [is] dead as hell and got raggedy shoes on.

What kind of nut hates baseball? A nut that’s sick.

What do you call a cat 🐈 that is glued down? A big cluck.

My neighbor has been mad at his wife for sunbathing nude. I personally am on the fence.