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Jokes
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Nut memes

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Goo

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A list of phrases that are bad to say after ejaculating. The list includes, "Whoopsie-doo, here comes the goo", "It's slime time", "Have some brogurt", "A shot of goo from me to you", "Gonna splurt the 'gurt".

Peanut

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A photograph shows Mr. Peanut flanked by two police officers. The image is overlaid with a news banner reading, "Local Police Bust A Nut".

Toothpaste

R3Y · 2 years ago

DIS IS NUT FOR KIDS

A product image of a green figure attached to a toothpaste tube and covering the opening. The text on the image reads: 'Toothpaste Cap Kids Toothpaste Attachment. Visit the Handmade Store. 4.0 stars. 15 ratings. Best Price on Amazon. -30% $8.99. List Price: $12.90. FREE Returns. A fun toothpaste cover that will make kids love brushing teeth. Produced in a 3D printer with organic PLA material that can be degraded in nature. It is placed on the cap of the toothpaste tube instead of the toothpaste cap. (Not compatible with non-standard pastes) It is not a hazardous material (toy). Do not wash in hot water or in the machine. The toothpaste tube product in the product is for promotional purposes. You can contact us for color preferences.'

Attack

Wade · 2 years ago

Bro really said “eat shit”

A comic book panel shows Sonic and Knuckles confronting an enemy. Sonic tells Knuckles to secure the Master Emerald to prevent the enemy from using its power. Knuckles questions if Sonic is crazy. The panel shows the enemy attacking, with a sound effect 'SHKOOM'

Kid

Anonymous · 2 years ago

A tweet that reads: "Nutted in her braces now my kids behind bars."

Squirrel

LoserIsPro · 3 years ago

rlly

A cartoon of a squirrel with a sly smile standing in front of three acorns. Above the squirrel, the words "DEE'S BIG NUTS" are printed in large, bold letters. Below the acorns, the text "Written by Mark Thunder" is displayed.

Hand

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A hand giving a thumbs up in front of a sign that reads "GO NUTS IN HERE". The sign belongs to a restaurant called AYOUB'S.

Album

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A screenshot of a Twitter conversation. The initial tweet from @OvOBrezzzy expresses extreme positive sentiment about a new Drake and 21 Savage album using vulgar and sexual language: 'Drake and 21 put both of they meat in my ears and nutted at once with this new album 🤤🤤🤤🔥🔥🔥'. A user named peazy replies, criticizing the phrasing with 'just say the album good nigga wtf', accompanied by a reaction image of a character looking disgusted from an animated movie.

Phone

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

Bill Nye is standing on a beach holding a sign that says: "You can become exempt from No Nut November if you change your phone's calendar to December 1."

Dad

Nut Master · 2 years ago

A puppet-like character with a shocked expression is seen mid-ejaculation, with a white substance flying through the air. The text above the image says, "when you nut and your dad walks into the room."

Hunting

Anonymous · 1 year ago

He doesn't have nuts anyway.

The image shows a two-panel comparison. The top panel depicts a man in hunting attire holding a rifle in a field. The text above reads, "If you think this was bad..." The bottom panel shows a man in a suit gesturing to a shotgun that has a yellow star burst around it and the text below reads "It could have been worse!"

Eye

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

The image shows a conversation where Enraged Rapboat and RapBoat are exchanging crude messages. Enraged Rapboat says, "IM LITERALLY GONNA NUT ON YOU," and then, "IN YOUR EYES." RapBoat replies, "NOT IF I NUT ON YOU FIRST!!!!!!!" and then calls Enraged Rapboat a "FAKER!!!!!!"

Transphobia

Wade · 2 years ago

Based

A screenshot of a series of comments. The first comment by May TheBlahaj states: "Damn unless I'm crazy the level of transphobia on wje is insane." Followed by a reply by Snapback Jester, "You're crazy, and nobody cares". May TheBlahaj then replies: "Let me guess, Wade?", and finally nut cracker writes: "oh god".

Squirrel

yourmomleft yourdadf · 3 years ago

true

A squirrel holds a gun, as if to threaten the viewer. The text says: WHEN SOMEONE MESSES WITH YOUR NUTS

Bunch

LoserIsPro · 3 years ago

lol

The image shows two CDs, each next to each other like eyes on a face. Above, the text says, "I have a bunch of old albums. Would you like 2 CDs? - yeah sure" and below the text says, "To see Deez Nuts!"

Diary entry

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

The image shows a page from a diary with hand-written text and a small drawing of a person on a couch looking dejected.

Message

Chexers · 2 years ago

A screenshot of two text messages from "Grandma". The first message, sent 1 minute ago, reads: "Why are you posting on Facebook about not having nut in November?" The second message, sent now, reads: "If you developed a nut allergy I need to modify my recipes. Call me back."

Covid

LoserIsPro · 3 years ago

lol again

The image shows a bunch of red roses and an image of the covid virus. The text on the image reads: "Roses are red, Covid is the flu. Can I quarantine deez nuts inside of you?"

Life

AverageDayInOhio · 3 years ago

NIGGAAA

A close-up of a dog's face with the text "We carry kids in our nuts our whole life, y'all do it 9 months. Don't compare us."

Card

MEME LORD · 2 years ago

A man with a beard and a red shirt is sweating and smiling broadly. In the background are digital cards, including one of LeBron James in a USA jersey. The text reads, "BUSTED A FAT NUT AFTER PULLING RARE USA BRON BRON CARD. CashNastyReacts, 54K views, 20 hours ago."

Walnut

Anonymous · 7 years ago

I nutted on the wall, call that a walnut.