Shell jokes
Why doesn't my egg want to crack?
Because I hate my egg-sistence.
Most states:
"It's ok, it won't be awkward. We're still friends."
Alabama:
"She didn't wanna be my girlfriend anymore. But she said she'll still be my sister."
What did the taco say to the Sea Turtle? I like your shell!
My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer. I'm not too worried, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf....ftysrrtfgbjysou34w45pjr578v
What do you do after your girlfriend with two broken legs dumps you?
Take her wheelchair, she'll come crawling back.
My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer. I'm not too worried, I think she's joking.
Stage 4 cancer is like a woman. You can’t beat it, but if you do, she’ll probably come back again.
What do you call a paralyzed turtle?
Shell shocked.
Why do mermaids wear seashells?
They are too big for “B” shells, and too small for “D” shells.
My wife told me she’ll slam my head into the keyboard if I don’t get off the computer.
I’m not too worried—I think she’s jokingdkdkslalkdlkfjslfjslksdlkfjuahehwhgwdklaljdf.
My woman is a nine on a bad day, but she’ll be 10 on her birthday.
Where do you find a turtle with no legs?
Right where you left it.
What did the turtle do when he ran out of gas?
He went to the Shell station.
A man opened a snail farm.
He said that it is a slow-moving business.
- I think you're EGGcellent.
+ Wow... You really CRACK ME UP with that joke. I think you're a EGGxtraordinary comedian.
- Really? Are you done yet?.
+ Are you kidding? I have a DOZEN of them.
What did Gandalf say to Mario? "You shall not pass!"
I hope death is a woman That way she'll never look at me twice
What do you call a snail without a shell?
Dead.
Crack me, break me, love me, and you ate me--egg.
What's the difference between a peanut and a priest?
With a peanut, you have to break the shell open for the nut to come out.