Never jokes
I will never forget my girlfriend's last words... "Get off of me! STOP!" *slurp*... Dead.
What is never ordered in an orphanage?
A family sized pizza!
Yo mama is so fat your dad could never get away.
"(My beard actually connects.)" "Like the connection you never had with your father."
Bring a knife into the shower. NEVER gonna see that coming! He pulls the curtain like ‘re re‘ and you're like ‘re re’ yourself, motherfucker, and stab him right in the eye! You thought the psycho was out there? SURPRISE, the psycho’s IN HERE with the Irish Spring on them!
Honestly
What has a kid with cancer and Peter Pan in common?
They will never grow up.
Why do orphan kids never eat homemade food? Because they don’t even have one!
So an orphan goes to the store and gets a bunch of cartons of milk.
The cashier goes, "Woah, why so much?"
The orphan goes, "My dad never came back with the milk, so, well, here we are!"
Few jokes (sorry if they have already been used).
1 I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
2 Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn? Because he always has a great fall.
3 Have you heard the one about the skunk? Never mind, it really stinks.
4 It's always windy in a sports arena. All those fans.
5 What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course!
6 Comic Sans walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your type here."
7 What's the easiest way to get straight As? Use a ruler.
8 Why were they called the Dark Ages? Because there were lots of knights.
What does a Right-Winger say when he sees a rainbow above the sky?
"A colorful sky? That's too woke for me. Jesus and our ancestors would have never stood for this!"
Hey anime girl, I hope you know that Jayden is a boy and we got back together.
Hahahaha, you never had a chance, so hahahaha!
POV: You keep having auditory hallucinations and fully believe your house is haunted because you never went and got diagnosed for schizophrenia.
Stephen Hawking is so lucky to go to heaven.
Oh never mind, here comes the stairway.
Crying babies are like parties. No matter how many times you try to end it, it keeps going.
Dark humor is like a kid with cancer.
It never gets old.
Hi, are you even my sister?
Yes, I am.
No, you're not, because you never even existed as my sister.
You're so skinny you never gain weight. You're so skinny you're a thin stick.
What do a crippled person's legs and the Twin Towers have in common? They both went down and never came back up.
Why did Hitler turn to genocide after a failed career as an artist?
He never learned to mix the colors.
Daughter: Mommy, what ever happened to Steven Hawking?
Mother: He died.
Daughter: How did he die?
Mother: He never got recharged.