Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Sometimes you just need to take a drive through the city to clear your head
-JFK
What's both red, white and sometimes purple My arms...
Just all us depressed people joking about our depressed lives, we should hang out sometime
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What's the similarity between women and car parking spaces? The good ones are always taken, and sometimes when nobody's looking, you slip in the disabled one
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guy spills milk on a me i say " it's OK we all make mistakes sometimes but apparently your mom made a big one
Once upon a time, Bob was in his hospital bed, receiving medical treatment not that far after finding out he had cancer. One day, his friend Jeremy decided to visit him. Jeremy told his best buddy this very inspiring sentence: "Sometimes in life, you and your heart will climb tall peaking mountains, and low flat valleys, and all after that we'll be happy forever in heaven, eventually."
little did Bob know that Jeremy was talking about his heart monitor
Sometimes, I think back on all the mistakes I've ever made.
Then I realize "My daughter isn't THAT bad..."
Sometimes, stairs get me down.
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Sometimes i wish my gf was here that way we could have some fun in my bed, the I realize she's right across the hall. (SWEET HOME ALABAMA)!!
Sometimes my Battery life has the same recognition as me :(
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I had a horse named mayo and sometimes mayonnaise
sometimes i get jealous when i see a gravestone
I was in a motivational seminar about depression the other day and she said i could be anything i wanted to be if i put my mind to it, sometimes you just have to bite the bullet and do it even if it's messy
Sometimes I just wake up in the morning and think damn better luck next time
