I was at school one day, and my teacher gave me homework. Once I got home, I did not do my homework, but I watched TV. After the movie, I finally went to go do my homework. I was almost done with my homework when I got to the last question. I didn't know the answer, so I asked the closest living being to me, which was my dog, and I asked him: what's two minus two? He said nothing.
Movie Jokes
Director: Hi, we are making a huge cliffhanger in this movie.
Actor: Really? What do I do?
Director: You will play the part of the cliff. (holds up hanging rope)
Hey, did you know Paul Walker's gay?
Why do you say that?
Because he likes to wrap himself around long, old wood.
Why are theaters popular among cows?
They enjoy watching moovies.
Little Jimmy was in the shower singing "Dame Tu Cosita," and her mom heard it and went to the shower, and Jimmy's mom saw Jimmy wearing a bathing suit in the shower, and Jimmy yells "WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY SWAMP!"
Why didn’t Harry Potter use the chamber to teach Dumbledore’s army?
Because at one point poisonous gases were put in it.
When Simba was walking too slow, I told him to mufasa.
Q: What's an animation similar to Finding Nemo, but the fish has cancer? A: Finding Kemo.
"I think Hannibal Lecter is soooo sexy... I'd like him to eat me!"
"G.I. Jane 2, can't wait to see it!"
This kid yelled "Jenga" when we were watching a 9/11 documentary.
Yo mama so fat, even Thanos had to snap twice.
Why did the cow cross the road?
'Cause he wanted to go to a moooooooooooooooooooooooovie.
What's got 4 legs and is stronger than Superman?
Christopher Reeve's horse.
Yo mama played the iceberg in Titanic.
When someone got the ghost in them, sound in the Priest Busters.
When something strange and it ain't no who you gonna call? Priest Busters.
Why do orphans hate Batman the movie?
Because at least he gets noticed by people, and also he stole their life story!
Titanic: And I’m nominating all passengers for the Ice Bucket Challenge!
I'm writing a movie about 9/11. It's called "September 11th Two Thousand Fun."
Why can't orphans watch PG movies? Parental guidance.
