Simba jokes

You wanna know proof that cats don't always land on their feet? Well then, watch The Lion King.

Simba was walking too slow so I told him to Mufasa.

So you know "The Lion King."

Do you remember Simba?

Well, his dad is really strong, and he walks really fast, but Simba walks really slow.

So I told him to Mufasa.

I saw Simba walking slowly.

I told him "Mufasa!"

"Simba is proof cats don’t always land on their feet."

My friend Jimmy said his dad is exactly like Santa. I asked, "Why is it because he gives people presents?" Jimmy told me, "No, it's because I hear so many good things about him and how he's gonna come home, but never see him."

The Somalian Olympics Team has just apologized to the Olympic Committee after realizing that sailing and shooting were two separate events.

I bet China can be the best baseball team. They took out the entire world with just a bat.

Why do orphans play Sims?

Because they can make themselves a family.

Slavery and discipline, it's kind of the same thing. You get whipped for doing the wrong thing.