Mom jokes
I accidentally said, "Go cry to your mom," to an orphan. 😭
Hey, is anyone’s mom missing? Yeah, yours.
Everyone makes mistakes. Like my mom, she made a mistake 13 years ago.
I was cussing out this kid for stealing, and their mom walked in and said, "Hey, language!" I just said, "English, bitch!"
My mom once told me to spread positivity across the world, so I did.
I spread Covid across the globe because I tested positive :D
Me: Where's your mom?
Kid: [cries]
Me: [leaving from the adoption center]
My mom said that being straight is good, but if you're straight, how do you walk? So I decided to be gay.
Mom: “Guess where I’m taking you, son!”
Son: “To the playground?”
Mom: “No, to the morgue.”
Your mom is so fat, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.
Dad: Honey!
Mom: What?
Dad: All of the broken condoms are on the bed.
Mom: WHAT!?
Children: *staring*
What's the difference between a God and my mom?
My mom exists. I mean... she did at one point! Unlike any "Gods."
Repeat after me...
Me: "You have a weird style."
Mom: "You have a weird style."
Me: "Um, not your mirror!" *runs away*
"Joe Biden's mom is so fat, she's very fat folks, she's so fat I'm gonna use her to build my new wall"-Trump
So, when I'm about to take a shower, my mom says, "Take a shower." When I'm about to take out the trash, my mom says, "Take out the trash."
Your mom is emo, Deacon.
Luca’s Mom and Dad be throwing the kids into the fountain in the city, but they're sea monsters, so if they went to jail for that, they would be on death row anyway. 🤣
What do you call multiple quintuplets that look the same?
Naruto's mom.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his mom said, "Ven bakac."
Knock, knock.
Your mom.
Why did the baby cow cross the road?
To find its mom who has the milk.