Mom jokes
Mom! (DYM 3)
The only people who do yo mama jokes wish they had a mom.
One day a mom who looked like a pig broke the car down.
I wanna date you.
Said mom, dad said no, you are a horrid, f*cking d*ck.
I asked my mom if I could be Wednesday (from the Addams family). She said no. She said I would look creepy and weird. She said I HAVE TO BE SOMETHING CUTE. The outfit looked ridiculous. Everyone else looked spooky except for me ;-;.
9 months before I was born,
I went to a party with my dad and left with my mom.
My mom picked my major.
You look like your mom and your dad had a child.
NEWS: A man kidnapped a 13-year-old girl.
MOM OF GIRL: The man had a shady face and a receding hairline.
My mom interrupted my gaming session to tell me to hang up the lights.
I hung something else instead.
Your mom is so fat, she looks like she ate the marshmallow from Ghostbusters.
The way you are so ugly your parents even regret the day you were born.
The way you are so black when your mom is bathing you in the dark, she has to put flour in the water to see you.
🤣🤣🤣
"There is no way you can fit in there."
"Says who?"
"Your mom."
"When?"
"Last night."
"OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-"
Okay, what do you call that purple thing in your mom's top dresser drawer that she calls her best best friend for some weird reason?
Dad better look out from Bob, battery-operated boyfriend, hahaha!
My mom: Your life could be worse. You could be Tracy Latimer.
Me: I wish I were Tracy Latimer, then someone would kill me.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To slide into your mom's bed.
Your mom disrespected your dad when he saw your face.
Your mom is so fat that when she stood on a scale, it said, "We need an actual person, not an elephant!"
He huffed and he puffed, but instead of blowing the house, he choked it down with his mom.
Your mom.