ME jokes

I am thinking of removing my spine.

It's only holding me back.

Like this post and comment down below if you want me to announce my real name in my next post!

My Mum texted me she had lost her phone.

Me and my friends are going to create a Steps tribute band. We are all in wheelchairs, so we are going to be called "Ramps."

Me: Joe left today.

Orphan: Who's Joe?

Me: Joe mama!

I harvested indigo to make dye. I made the dye. I made a number dye. I dyed the dye. I rolled the dye. It made me die.

Why does Lincoln like Ronnie Anne?

She is the only one that calls me "lamo."

My stepdad took me to work, and he told me I could climb trees.

I woke up in a hospital. Wait, did I mention that my stepdad was a lumberjack?

I go to get my mail.

Stranger: "Something fell out of your pocket! April fools!"

Me: "You're adopted, April fools!"

Then I see an orphan behind me and gets all excited.

I remember last year all these bitches called me lame so I stopped the simping and pretended I was gay, now I think they're all fucking with me.

I'm an LGBTQ imposter got cut last year know I've made the roster and you may think I'm a monster. I'm just just tryna see some titties.

"Freshfry, please leave me and prince alone! I never asked you to join our chat!"

I'm really bored and I don't know what's up with Prince. He isn't talking to me.

And Freshfry, why are you so mean now?

Roses are red, Violets are blue, God made me pretty, WHAT THE FRICK HAPPENED TO YOU?

I would like to remind all passengers that this is a no-smoking flight, although do feel free to join me in the cockpit, where we've opened a window.

5 4 3 2 1. I love the huge bright sun. 5 4 3 2 1. My life has just begun. Though Akeld and Unkown, make me feel alone, they want be dead, and off with my head, and all I said was... NO FRICKIN' HATIN' IN THESE COMMENTS! WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

FUCK ME DADDY!!!!

If you were to ask me, "What is the easiest job in the world?", it would be an Australian psychiatrist.

"G'Day, G'Day...how you doing...no worries, next!"

Chenle: One time when I was younger, someone asked me how old I was and I forgot. I had to Wikipedia my age to remember.

Jisung: This is the richest thing I've ever heard in my life.

Person: Bro, you have a bad and stupid life.

Me: Yeah, it was all good till you were here!

Person: WTF!

A guy walks to his friend's house. His friend says, "Where is your girlfriend?" The guy says, "Meet me at the cemetery in a week."