ME jokes
My brother told me he wanted to find a golden apple tree in real life. I told him it was a fruitless mission.
Teacher: Why did you throw paper airplanes at the twin sisters?
Me: You wouldn't get it.
I went to the store the other day and scanned an emo's arm.
It gave me a discount!
There are two muffins baking in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Phew, is it getting hot in here or is it just me?"
The other muffin says, "AAAAHHH!! A TALKING MUFFIN!"
Guy: Michael Jackson wasn’t in ancient times!
Me: hee hee egypt.
Memes
Knock knock, who's there? God.
God who? NO, you idiot, there is no God. I am your father and you have locked me out of my own house!
What is an orphan's favorite Roblox game? Adopt Me.
Me holding a new cat: Say hi to my little friend!
My friends: Hi to my little friend!
How do you start a fight in space?
"Comet me, bro."
Hello, if you don't know me (which you probably don't), my name is watersharky, or WS, or Shark.
I am a normal, weird kid/preteen, and that's it. If you want more info on me, I will gladly share! Shark out.
Riddle me this. Riddle me that.
Why did my parents never come back?
Me: Why am I an orphan?
Friend: I don't know.
Me: Ask your mom.
Imagine being emo.
Couldn't be me.
A 14 year old girl finds out she is pregnant. Her: "Crap! My mom is going to kill me!"
The fetus: "lol same here."
So I’m riding in the car with my dad and all of a sudden I smell something rank without warning.
My dad starts laughing at me.
Dad: “Son! That must have been an orphan fart! You know why?”
Me: “Why dad?”
Dad: “Because it ain’t got no pop!”
Moxxie: ThEy CaLlEd Me A pOsSuM!! i'M nOt A pOsSuM!!
A Souls fan raped me. He said, "Try finger, but hole."
I wish the doctor would prescribe me some medicine that's actually useful, like cyanide.
Hey, y'all, I just wanna say thanks to Gwen on here. She writes jokes, and she got me through a lot xx.
Me: Why do you need to use shampoo when you are already bald? 🤣