All of a guys son's came out gay. He ordered 10 shots in a bar. The bartender asks "Do u have anyone in ur family who likes women?" The man said "My wife does!"
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Why did the man sit in his porch and bark at the postman when he came? Because his dog had a sore throat!
why did the man die of the actors performance?
the performance was unbeLIVEable
Spider man no way home know why he’s a orphan now
What do you call a lanky yellow man with abnormally large ears? Zac hahahahahahahahahahah
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"Hey, man do you have any ben and jerry's?"
"yeah I have two of them fresh and preserved in the freezer"
"I meant the ice cream bro..."
Confucius say, man who bite electric wire get shocking experience.
Man: Hey siri! Siri: Yes? Man: Im desperate, will you marry me? Siri: Uh... *phone literally explodes*
You just shot an unarmed man. Well he should have armed himself then
I went into the supermarket everything was half off. of course I took the bottom half of spider man
I told this man to rev his vehicle.
Didn't know wheelchair's can't rev.
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What do you call black Man having a seizure? Chocolate shake
A man was walking home but felt tired so took a short cut through the cemetery. He then heard a tap tap then out of the corner of his eye he saw a man with a hammer hitting the tombstone the man said "you scared me I thought you were a ghost" the other person mumbled "they spelt my name wrong"
A man walks into a bar and sees a jar full of money and he asks the bartender what's up with that jar of money bartender says you gotta do 3 task he takes the shot of Jack and the customer says what are the tasks he says the 1st one is but the 1st 1 is I got about a 12' gator in the back that's got a bad tooth and you gotta pull it he says all right what's the 2nd 1 he said I got a big old girl upstairs that aint had no loving in a long time you gotta make her smile he takes another shot of Jack he said all right what's the 3rd 1 he said you see that horse outside you gotta make him laugh and cry Guy goes upstairs goes out back comes out to the front comes back in the other customer said give him the jar The guy says I took care of that lady's tooth and I made that alligator smile well how'd you make the horse laugh he said easy i told him I had a bigger deck then him bartender says how did you make him cry he said easy I showed him
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a man walks into a bar he see's a family court judge, his wife, her lawyer, and a police officer, he gets on his hands and knees and prays to god out loud, the bar tender says, why are you praying? He says, because I just saw the 4 horsemen of the apocalypse, and the bible tells me when I see them the end is at hand.
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