A man from France, a man from Britain, and a man from New York are on an exposition to the Amazon Forest. After a while they get lost. So as they are walking suddenly the bushes jump up into the air and men with spears are there. One man says "Hey, your in our sacred land. So what we are going to do is skin you and then use your flesh to make canoes. But we aren't that crazy so we will let you choose how you die." The man from France said, "bring me the poison." The man from Britain said, "bring me the gun" And the man from New York said, "bring me a fork" The guy was confused with the fork but still brought it the items and gave it to them. The guy from France said, "for the France!" And drank the poison and died. The man from Britain said, "long live the queen!" And shot himself and died. And the man from New York started stabbing himself with the fork and said "MAKE A CANOE OUT OF THIS YOU FUCKERS"
A depressed man has been thinking of killing himself and his friend says "Find jesus instead he'll help you!" and than the man says "It's pretty hard to 'get help' from something that doesn't exist".
A plane is about the crash into the ocean, and the passengers are freaking out. A woman stands up, takes off her clothes, and says, "Before I go, is there a person man enough to make me feel like a woman?" A man stands up, takes of shirt, and says, "Here, iron this!"
“Dude come here and see a rabbit!”
“Ok!”
“Are u ok man?”
“Yeah I’m fine”
“Dude pull your pants back up!
A man ate a glue stick. It tasted bad. He died.hahahahah
Son: Dad what's a morbid joke? Father: Walk over to a homeless man and throw a rock at him then you will know. Son: But Dad I don't have arms or legs. Father: Now you know.
It was a sunny day and I was in school. I had history lessons and we had cool subject! The subject was about the Pendulum, the man who statpaded against small teams and camped in pen spot! Our teacher showed us a map with marked countries in which penaldo dived like a dolphin!
Why do gay 👬 👨 👨 👨 👨 want to 😫 😫 😫 eat each others meat because 🥩 🥓 🥩 🍖 🍖 is meat and 👨 has to 😋 eat 🍖 🥓 🥩
One time a man climbed a mountain and saw a guy
Who are you?
I am mountain man
A man is watching TV and his wife comes down and says"I just fell down the stairs, did you not hear me?" Man,"Sorry i thought it was the start of Eastenders"
A man asked another man if he was happy with his marriage, he replied," Yes I'm very happy. We go on date night every week. The other man asked when? She goes on wednesday and I go on thursday
A man walking on his roof, carrying an axe. He drops it on someone below him and says "Sorry, It was an axe-cident!"
a priest sees a man about to commit suicide the man says "I have nothing to live for here I will die go to heaven and get 72 virgins" then the priest says "no need for this I will take you to the local elementary school"
A man is being sued for raping a deaf girl. The judge, showing his pinky: You should be ashamed, man, your conscience is even smaller than that! The girl, showing her arm: Mhhhmmhmm, mhhmhm!
How can you tell if a heterosexual man has been using a computer? there is sperm on the screen
A man once ate the left-side of a person one guy watching asked if the guy he was eating was okay. the man eating him said "No... it's okay he's alright now."
what did the blind man say on Christmas? I can feel your presents!
Why did the man with no arms fall off his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him.
what did the mans dick say to the man
i just cant "hand"le it
A blind man once told me, he smokes a lot because he has nothing to look forward. Well, let just say that I see his point.
