Heterosexual jokes
How do you stop a heterosexual woman from sucking your dick? piss inside her mouth
Why does a married heterosexual man want an anonymous blowjob at a glory hole inside an adult bookstore?
Because he doesn't want his wife to find out that he got a blowjob from another man.
If a heterosexual man gets anonymous oral sex from another heterosexual man at a glory hole, it's called a "brojob", but if a homophobic heterosexual man gets anonymous oral sex from a gay man at a glory hole, it's still called a "brojob". Does it cycle now?
If a heterosexual man wanted his dick sucked, what would a feminist say to him that a gay man would never say to him?
"Not now, I have a headache."
Why does a heterosexual man believe that if a heterosexual man gets his dick sucked by another heterosexual man it's called a "brojob"?
Because it's male bonding.
What do you call a heterosexual man performing fellatio on another heterosexual man?
Bisexual.
Heterosexual sodomy is like religion. If you were forced to accept it when you were younger, you probably would not like it when you become an adult.
Why are heterosexual women jealous of gay men?
because gay men can perform fellatio on men better than they can.
What is the difference between a man performing anilingus on a woman and a man performing cunnilingus on a woman?
If a man is performing anilingus on a woman, it is not classified as heterosexual sodomy, you fucking idiot!!!!!
How much of a homophobic heterosexual man are you? I'm so homophobic I won't suck a big dick that has ketchup on it.
How do you know when you should tell a heterosexual woman to stop sucking your dick?
When there is blood coming out of your dick instead of sperm.
How does a gay man trick a heterosexual man into giving him a blowjob?
The gay man asks the heterosexual man if he wants to give him a "brojob."
What do you call a heterosexual man giving a brojob to another heterosexual man?
gay now, heterosexual later.
How can you tell if a heterosexual man has been using a computer?
There is sperm on the screen.
Why does a heterosexual man swallow the sperm of another man after he has given him a brojob?
Because of the cream filling inside, just like the individually wrapped cakes of Hostess Twinkies.
What did the lesbian vampire say to the heterosexual woman after she was done licking her pussy after she was done having her blood period?
"I will be back next month."
Why can a gay man give a better brojob to a heterosexual man than another heterosexual man?
Experience.
Why does the Catholic Church have a glory hole inside the confessional booth?
So a priest can give an anonymous blowjob to another bisexual man, or a gay man, or a heterosexual man that has a big dick after the priest hears their confession.
Why do heterosexual men and women that are married in France only perform anilingus on each other in their bedrooms?
Anal sex and oral sex is against the law in France.
How does a gay man trick a heterosexual man that is homophobic into giving him a brojob?
The gay man puts mustard on his dick and then puts his dick inside a glory hole.