Man jokes
A Middle Eastern man comes to the states to do a stand up show. He starts by saying “2 Jews walk into a bar, NOT IN MY COUNTRY!”
What is the craziest thing an Indian man does for sex?
Marriage.
There were three men in a car: the driver, a homeless man, and a rapper. The driver takes them to the woods and says, "I'm not really a cab driver, I'm a wanted killer." The homeless man says, "I'm not really homeless," and pulls out a chain. The rapper says, "If we're gonna be completely honest, I'm not a rapper, I'm a cop!"
What did the man do when he caught his wife cheating on him?
He honor-killed her.
How do you know Adam and Eve were White?
Have you ever tried taking a rib from a Black man?
A man bought a brand new iPhone but returned it, why?
The apple was already bitten.
Why do New Yorkers get what Spider-Man is saying?
Because he always makes spider-sense.
What do gay men like to suck each other's bananas because they like the ice cream filling?
I saw a man trying to rape a girl. I decided to help. She didn't stand a chance against both of us.
Sending gay men to prison makes no sense to me. I mean, you have sex with a man and then they lock you up with a bunch of other men. That would be like arresting someone for drunk driving and forcing them to become a bartender.
I used to have a girlfriend who would argue with me a lot for no reason. I look at her feet and say to her, "Here is £15, give yourself a foot pedicure, then come back to me. It clearly shows you have man feet. You are a woman; you should have woman feet. No wonder you boss me around too much as if you're the man of the house."
I saw a black man riding a brand new bike, so I went home to check my garage. It’s all good because I still saw mine still chained to the floor begging for food.
The cheetah and lion are racing. The cheetah wins.
The lion says, "Man, you a cheetah."
The cheetah says, "Nah, you lion!"
Once there was a man. A man who had a butt.
Once he was at this job interview and he was going to get the job, but just before the boss was going to hire him, he farted. It was a really bad one. It was 47 minutes long and so loud the windows rattled. When it was over, the man screamed and jumped out the window.
He didn't get the job.
Why is Jesus in pieces?
Because a one man band is Nine Inch Nails.
What is an orphan's favorite naval film?
"Spider-Man: No Way Home."
Two men walk into a bar. You’d think at least one of them would have ducked.
The first thing a man looks at in a woman, is her heart.
The fact that her breasts block the view is not her fault.
In 1941, Hans, a young German boy, was listening to the radio.
Over the radio, Hitler announced that Germany was now going to war with the United States.
"Father, where is the United States?" Hans asked.
His father pointed at a map of North America.
"Aren’t we currently at war with Russia? Where might that be?" he questioned his father.
The man pointed towards the Soviet Union.
"And I’m told we’re also at war with the British Empire. Where is that?"
The father pointed out all of the territories owned by the British.
"Where is Germany again, Father?"
He pointed to their home country in Central Europe.
Hans pondered this information for a second. "One last question, Father."
"Yes?"
"Has Hitler seen this map?"
Build a man a fire, he will be warm for a day. Give him some Tfox merch, and he will be on fire.