Man

Man jokes

Manslaughter

I will never understand why manslaughter is illegal.

Men should be able to laugh at whatever they want.

Road

Why did the blind man cross the road?

Don't ask me, he can't even see where he's going.

Hand

What do you say when a handicapped man forgets something? "He knew it like the back of his hand."

Dick

The woman had a dick, lol, it's your mom ahahahahahaha, yeah YOU! Jhon man! In New York City I am on to you! I will be under your bed tonight lol get a bodyguard!

Memes

Company

Man I hate it when companies do this crap, now you can't commit toaster bath anymore

A silver toaster is floating in space with a galaxy background. Text is written over the image: "New waterproof toaster."

Ginger

What do you get when you cross a Jamaican with a ginger?

A gingerbread man.

Orphan

Why do orphans like Spider-Man?

'Cause they really enjoy Far From Home and No Way Home. Damn, was he mad about Spider-Man Homecoming!

Robbery

Two kids told their parents they saw a man late at night entering their house on Christmas night.

The day later, they found out several houses were robbed.

Movie

Sorry man, but I got to say one thing. You know when a bully in a movie walks to you, then they walk up to you, and they smell you and say, "What are you doing?"

Birthday

A man dies of old age on his 25th birthday. How is this possible?

Answer: He was born on February 29.

Harassment

After a week of this, she can't stand it any longer.

The woman goes into her supervisor's office and tells him that she wants to file a sexual harassment suit against the man and explains why.

Marriage

Woman: Will you love me after marriage as well?

Man: That will depend on your husband. If he will, so of course I would!

Head

Man 1: Knock knock.

Man 2: Who's there?

Man 1: Ice.

Man 2: Ice who?

Man 1: I crushed your head.

Girlfriend

A 7-foot-tall man walks into a restaurant with his 4-foot-tall girlfriend, and the maitre d' says to the waiter, “He must be nuts over her.”

Girl

A man has been dating a girl forever. He finally says, "I love you." The girl says, "Aww, thanks." The man looks at her, "Are you not gonna say it back?" The girl says, "No, I can’t."

Demon

When you tell the men in the suits you can see that the demons of your sins are watching you...

But they know you're blind.

Credit Card

Why are hindustan bhai so good at Python?

When they are hungry, they use Python and take credit card information ;). You know what they say, you give a man a curry and he eats for a day, you give a man a language and he eats for a lifetime.

Asphalt

A man walks into a bar carrying a big chunk of asphalt and says to the bartender, “Make mine a double Scotch and one more for the road.”