Man jokes
Chuck Norris doesn't breathe. He holds air hostage.
Your dad's Spider-Man because he's far from home.
Why did the man get fired from the calendar factory?
He only took a day off.
Iron Man is just a golden retriever with a red background.
Your hairline is so far back that if you wore yellow, people would think you were One Punch Man.
Memes
I hate school. I mean, why can't you pull out a 12 gauge and shoot everyone, including the teachers?! This generation is too soft, man.
What do you say when a handicapped man forgets something? "He knew it like the back of his hand."
I put a guy in a fridge. He said, "I had a nightmare!"
How did the gay man die? Homicide.
What does Batman have that Superman doesn't?
The ability to visit his biological parents' grave.
Why do orphans have no parents?
Because it was Batman!
What do you call a man who loves Adidas and Puma and drives a Volkswagen? Potential Nazi.
Sorry man, but I got to say one thing. You know when a bully in a movie walks to you, then they walk up to you, and they smell you and say, "What are you doing?"
A man walks into a bar carrying a big chunk of asphalt and says to the bartender, “Make mine a double Scotch and one more for the road.”
A 7-foot-tall man walks into a restaurant with his 4-foot-tall girlfriend, and the maitre d' says to the waiter, “He must be nuts over her.”
Why are hindustan bhai so good at Python?
When they are hungry, they use Python and take credit card information ;). You know what they say, you give a man a curry and he eats for a day, you give a man a language and he eats for a lifetime.
Woman: Will you love me after marriage as well?
Man: That will depend on your husband. If he will, so of course I would!
A man dies of old age on his 25th birthday. How is this possible?
Answer: He was born on February 29.
Two kids told their parents they saw a man late at night entering their house on Christmas night.
The day later, they found out several houses were robbed.
Man 1: Knock knock.
Man 2: Who's there?
Man 1: Ice.
Man 2: Ice who?
Man 1: I crushed your head.