Man

Man jokes

Scratch

  • People are fighting in a war, and a man gets hit four times in the arm and says, "'Tis but a scratch!"

    And the other guy, looking at him in shock, says, "A scratch? Your arm is off your body!"

    Ice Cream

  • Q. What kind of school does an ice cream man go to?

    A. Sunday school!

    Psst! Don't understand? Well, "Sunday" sounds like "Sundae." Get it now? Nope? Sorry. Plus, it's an ice cream homophone joke.

    Nickel

  • Why did the man laugh when he only had just one nickel and one penny in his pocket?

    He had a 6 cents of humor.

    Wife

  • What's the difference between a man's wife and his dog?

    Lock them both in the trunk for three hours and see which is happy to see you when you open it.

    Name

  • Person 1 says to Person 2: "I know a man with a wooden leg named Smith."

    So Person 2 says to Person 1: "What's the name of his other leg?"

    Wife

  • A man wakes up and asks his wife, “Are you okay? You were cursing me all night in your sleep.” The wife replies, “Who says I was sleeping?”

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  • Balloon

  • *America shoots down balloon*

    China: "You killed an innocent man!!"

    USA: "What?!"

    China: "Yes, he was a famous sumo wrestler."

  • 1
  • Tit

  • Pussies and tits have one thing in common: they're both made for kids, but men end up licking or suckling them.

  • 1