Man jokes
Why did Dad Man quit acting?
I don’t know either.
The man told the women, “Roses are red, violets are blue, you suck cock and you enjoy it too.”
Then she said that's true.
How do you spot a blind man in a nudist resort?
It's not hard.
For every dollar a man makes, a woman makes 70 cents.
That’s unfair! Now the man only has 30 cents!
It's the Olympics.
Q) Why did the man decide not to run in his race? A) Because of Olympiad.
What do you call a man who offended an NFL player...
Odin Floyd.
What’s the bravest thing a man can do?
Say, “I’m going to get milk!” to his wife and kids.
A man and a boy went into a forest. The boy said he was scared. The man said, "How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone."
A man goes for a pee in a haunted house.
He unzips his pants at the urinal when a man dressed as a goblin chuckles next to him. "You got a small dick, buddy," the man says to him.
Sorry man... I kinda messed those things up.
An orphan walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand, "Hey, bum, bum, bum, got a family?"
What do you call a man who can fly? A flying man.
There was a man. He took a right. He took another right. He took a last right. Why did he stop?
What is the postman's favorite fruit?
Water-mail-on.
People are fighting in a war, and a man gets hit four times in the arm and says, "'Tis but a scratch!"
And the other guy, looking at him in shock, says, "A scratch? Your arm is off your body!"
Q. What kind of school does an ice cream man go to?
A. Sunday school!
Psst! Don't understand? Well, "Sunday" sounds like "Sundae." Get it now? Nope? Sorry. Plus, it's an ice cream homophone joke.
Yo mama so stupid, she thought baseballs were at Batman!
Why did the number 5 get voted out of the game in the 1st round? Because he was an odd man out!
I like men like I like money, always getting lost under my bed.
My dad was such a good man. RIP, Osama bin Laden.