Made

Made jokes

Bird

    • Bro, yesterday this bird made the weirdest chirp. It sounded something like this:

    "Error code 6, 4, 4, 2, sound: bird call, failed to play, government drone 0, 7, 7, 5 requires maintenance."

    Anyone know what bird that is?

  • 4
    • Made memes

    Punishment

    • People were deciding how to punish a terrible criminal, and one man came up with a great idea.

    He sat him in a movie theater with no food at all and made him watch a 12 hour documentary about the country Hungary.

  • 1

    • Gun

    • Little Johnny likes to play with toy guns.

    Little Johnny paints them black.

    Little Johnny went to a gun store.

    Little Johnny made a big mess.

    The cemetery people were getting paid.

  • 1

    • Boy

    • A boy was terrible at writing sentences, so his teacher gave him an assignment to help with that. The boy was to go home, write five sentences, and return to school the next day.

    When he went home, he took a notepad and a pen and went to his dad for help. His dad was in a very important business call, so he angrily shouted at the child, "Shut up, you donkey!" The boy noted down that sentence. He next went to his mom, who assumed that he wanted to play video games, so she said, "No, my dear, tomorrow." That was his second sentence. For the third sentence, he went to his older brother, who was watching football where someone scored a goal, so he was jumping up and down yelling, "Goal! Goal!"

    For the fourth sentence, he went to his sister, who was singing, "Spider-Man, Spider-Man!" For the last sentence, he went to his grandmother, who was cleaning the toilet and singing, "Under the toilet, under the toilet."

    He went to school the next day, and his teacher asked him to tell her the sentences. The boy said, "Shut up, you donkey!" The teacher got angry after hearing this and asked the boy, "Do you want me to slap you?" The boy said, "No, my dear, tomorrow." This made the teacher so angry that she slapped the boy. Immediately, he started jumping up and down yelling, "Goal! Goal!" The teacher dragged him to the principal's office, as she was fed up with him. The principal asked the boy what his name was, to which he replied by singing, "Spider-Man, Spider-Man!" She asked him where he lived, so he sang, "Under the toilet, under the toilet."

  • 8

    • Baby

    • Do you know how babies are made? The boy puts his penis in the girl's butt and goes up and down for ten minutes. Then the girl takes a pregnancy test, and if it says no, then you keep doing it until she is pregnant.

    The boy will lick the girl down there, and she will put his penis in her mouth and suck it. Then he will spit on his hand and rub it on her boobs and lick/suck them.

    Brownie

    • This morning, I was in the kitchen, and I saw a whole bunch of leftover brownies made from scratch. I just tasted one and spit it out because somebody put some goddamn weed in them, what the fuck!

  • 1

    • Sex

    • God made Adam and Eve have sex right out the gate.

    Then he made teenagers horny... yet here we are with a so-called "rise in teen pregnancy."

  • 0

    • Human

    • Me: Mom, if Adam and Eve are white, then how were slaves made?

    Mom: Well, Eve and the monkey fucked each other.

    Me: Oh, okay.

    Goes to school.

    Teacher: How were humans made?

    Me: Eve fucked the monkeys.

    Teacher: 😑

  • 1