Like jokes

The best news about a pretty girl with special needs is that you can get her to do exactly what you want her to do.

I mean, she probably thinks receiving oral is like 100% blood sausage coming right at her.

You look like a heroin addict in a women's refuge.

I like it when your mom keeps on top of things.

(Male fantasy)

Yeah, on top of me on the living room carpet, snogging my face off.

She asked me if I was hung like a horse, but I said no.

I'm hung like a person who wants to die, but then the rope broke.

Your hairline is so far back that it looks like Putin's tanks steamrolled through.

I don't like them white, pale, always talking about death EMO kids!

Sorry, I meant CHEMO kids.

You really seem like you don't want to be laughing at that rape joke, but somewhat ironically, I'm forcing you.

Like a work film, to take new in the center.

More good, Tar de Spring is the mill Murray Hurlowar Skelett Dwight Dowl - for its general help!

A vagina is like the weather. Once it’s wet, it’s time to go inside.

How do rappers like their pizza?

With extra rhyme-a-jalapenos.

BlessedBrian’s sense of humor is like a GPS without signal... LOST and going NOWHERE.

Watching paint dry sounds like a thrill compared to spending time with Slade.

Even Bob Ross couldn’t paint a happy little accident like BLESSEDBRIAN.

How do rappers like their coffee?

With a little bit of RAP-PUCCINO.

Leo is like a broken pencil... pointless.

Leo is like Monday mornings... everyone dreads her, but we're forced to deal with her anyway.

Your gene pool is more like a gene puddle.

In Jr. high, we all had to do a report on euthanasia. I misunderstood and wrote a report on how I'd really like a Korean girlfriend.

I’d tell BlessedBrian to aim for the stars, but it seems like his GRAVITATIONAL PULL is holding him back.

My friend was getting bullied so I went over and asked him to stop. It went a little bit like this:

Me: Dude, leave her alone. Him: Beat it, b*tch. *lots of arguing and swearing* Me: Ya know! The smartest thing that ever came outta your mouth was probably a penis. Him: *walks away*