Appearance jokes

Wife: "I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?"

Husband: "You have perfect eyesight."

I was gonna roast you about your chin, but I didn't know which one to talk about.

My child: "Dad, am I beautiful?"

Me: "You’re like the sun, sweetie. You’re painful to look at."

I’m not saying you’re going bald, but you’ll find Waldo before you find your hairline.

What do you call 100 rabbits walking backwards? A receding hare line.

Roses are red, violets are blue, Shrek thought he was ugly until he saw you.

Your hairline goes so far back even Dora the Explorer couldn’t find it.

I feel sorry that your hairline deployed from war with your forehead.

If being ugly was a crime, you would get a life sentence.

Your mom is so ugly that even Medusa turned to stone from looking at her!

You call me ugly, but maybe that is why we look alike.

Your hairline is so far back I learned about it in history class.

I have a friend of mine from school. I always see them with bangs, so I never knew what their forehead looked like until one day they came... Their forehead was bigger than Mount Everest, that you can make an entire Olympics mountain climbing audition on that forehead! :)

Your mom is so ugly her face would split in half when she sees you.

Your hairline is so bad that KSI's hairline actually looks normal.

Your hairline is built like a license plate.

Your hairline looks like Thanos snapped your hair out of existence.

Charlen's hairline is sooooo fat because it was never brushed.

You're so ugly, that's why me and your hairline go far back.

What do girls and your hairline have in common? They are both receding.