Light jokes
Why did the caretaker of the Twin Towers get sacked?
He left the landing lights on.
Why is being an electrician the easiest job in the world? It's literally light work.
Me and my wife love playing table tennis. I couldn’t win all day, but when it got dark, I managed to beat her. I don’t know how the police found out so quickly.
The sun is fire.
I was talking to a Muslim yesterday, and he asked me what it's like to be blind.
I happened to tell him about 20 jokes; in fact, I was working on my twentieth. So I answered with, "At least I don't have to screw in light bulbs. It's not like I need the damn things anyway."
If Kamala Harris is Indian, why doesn’t she have that dot on her head?
So she claims to be.
And the only black color I know is when you shut off the lights.
Your mom is so fat Buzz Lightyear had to say "To infinity to beyond" to leave her house.
What ankle is getting cut off of school? The lights.
Why did the rapper always carry a flashlight?
To SHINE A LIGHT on his talent!
What's braver than coming out gay? Taking a shit in an elementary school bathroom with those two kids that always mess with you and turn off the lights.
What’s the difference between your wife and a light switch?
I don’t turn on a light switch.
How many Senators fans does it take to change a light bulb?
All 3 of them.
Hockey for life!
How many Polish people does it take to change a light bulb?
One. But you need 5000 Soviet troops in case he goes on strike!
When God said, "Let there be light," He saw your mum and said, "Let there be dark."
I just bought a book about lamps...
So I can do some light reading over the weekend.
Which one's super super corny?
1. What's blue and not heavy? (🤔) Light blue.
2. What's blue and super hard to see?
Dark blue. (🤔)
You're so white that when I turn off the lights, you're a night light.
Yo mama so dumb, when she looked at the light, she said, "Why is the sun so close to me?"
How many crack heads does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, there is no electricity.
Why did the robot eat a lightbulb?
'Cause he was in need of a light snack!