Light Jokes

If the sun is 9n space, then why is there light on earth, but not in space?

I crashed into the back of a car at the lights today. A really short guy got out of it and said, “I’m not happy.” I said, “Well which one are you then?”

you so ugly that if you looked in the mirror you would walk into the light

THE FASTEST
THINGS ON EARTH
CHEETAH
AIRPLANE
SPEED OF LIGHT THE SPEES MY FARTS TRAVEL AT

VOTING QUARTERFINAL 1: LIKE: When the school shooter is about to leave your classroom and the autistic kid’s sketchers light up. DISLIKE: When the school shooter finds you and you think you’re gonna die but he remembers the time you gave him a pen. 🖌

Vote for the better joke

Do you want to hear a dark joke let me turn the lights off

I gotta song for Hawaii baby you light up my world like no body els

Friend 1: *turns off lights* Friend 2: *is there with us* Me: Woah! Where did friend 2 go?!

VOTING FINAL This vote is for the best School Shooter joke of the month. - LIKE: When the school shooter is about to leave your classroom and the autistic kid’s sketchers light up. DISLIKE: When you’re playing dead and the school shooter starts unbuckling his belt and you hear him say “This boy always had a fat ass”.

Vote for the better joke and the Joke of the Month will be announced in the comments tomorrow.

b.b
@benoobrown
Did anyone else's parents used to
drive them around neighbourhoods to
look at people's Christmas lights and it
used to be the most exciting thing
ever??

Like if you can relate and comment if you think this is funny

7 y/o me in my dad's car: Dad,
I wanna turn on the light. Can
I press this button?
My dad:
No!! That's the button that will kill everyone

Kate:can we have a threesome? Trevor:sure The lights go off and Trevor starts doing what he's supposed to be doing and then he feels something going up his back end he goes to punch the person behind him but then he turns on the let and it was Kate behind him and hes been fucking the guy the whole time.

So my dad tells these jokes and someone posted one on this website so...

How many polish people does it take to change a light bulb? 101, one to hold the light bulb and 100 to spin the house.

There’s also one about a bolin ball in a bath tub he hasn’t told me that though al research that

how many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

102, if you have some alive ones.

a couple has sex in the dark every single night one night the wife gets curious about what goes on so they start f...ing and she flicks the light on when she flicks the light on she catches him with a dildo playing with her pussy she's so mad that she started ranting and raving the husband says honey I know you're mad and I'll explain the toy just do me one favor explain the children.

A lawyer bought a beautiful yacht. He invited the law firm to come aboard for a great weekend. Saturday night was the candle light dinner and Sam drank too much, walked on the deck and fell over the rail into the water and was calling for help. Tom said, "Oh no the sharks will get him." All of the party lined along the rail and noticed the sharks were swimming around him in a circle. Jim said, the sharks are not even bothering him! And a shark lifted up his head out of the water and said, "Professional Courtesy."