Life jokes

Me. I am the joke.

Imagine not having a dad.

What's worse than a failed suicide, you ask?

I fail suicide because you forgot to do the dishes and your parents come after you and they're the ones to kill you, not yourself.

Life is karma... because I was born, God gifted me with social awkwardness, sh*t athletic skills, and stupidity.

Being an orphan isn’t all bad.

On the bright side, all your snacks are family sized.

I hope death is a girl. That way, it'll never come for me.

What’s the similarity between a broken pencil and my life? They’re both pointless.

Me, an orphan: *laughing at orphan jokes*

Some person: Stop laughing, it's sad to laugh at your pain.

Me, an orphan: That's the funny part, what am I going to do, tell my parents?

What's one advantage of being an orphan?

Nobody can make mama jokes about you. 🌚

I was spending my holiday in Paris with my gf. As we were walking near the city, a meteor hit and killed my gf.

Forensics did an autopsy on the corpse and concluded that someone missed a pen and hit my gf from the PSG training ground. SHAME ON YOU PESSI FOR RUINING MY LIFE! 🤬😡

Why did the orphan kill itself?

Because he's depressed about no family.

I saw a little boy sitting on a curb wearing rags.

I said: "Aww, are you an orphan?"

And he responded with "Yeah. What gave me away?"

And I said: "Your parents."

Putin be like CSGO is much harder in real life!

Chalie has an eating disorder, and he is shorter, so is his life, but he will never get a wife. He's a gay motherfucker who wants to be hit by a trucker?

You know they're lying when they say, "My mom's picking me up."

Are you a gun because I want to live with you?

Why are all orphans criminals?

Because they want to know what it's like to be wanted.

Orphan, they're enough of a joke.

I asked an orphan where his parents were.

(God, I wish I knew)

How do blind kids get punished?

By moving the furniture around the house.