Life jokes
Sell PC.
Go to Croatia.
Try to fly to the US to meet female.
US won't let me in.
End up in Norway.
Female leaves me.
Female gets arrested by feds.
Feds read all my messages and see my dick pics.
Just another day in the defib life.
What's the difference between me and an old man? No one pulled my life support.
There are 4 people on an airplane, and the pilot has a heart attack and dies. The plane is going down, and there are also only 3 parachutes. So the guy who knows how to cure cancer says, "I’m jumping. I can save many lives." Then the 46th president, Joe Biden, says, "I’m taking the 2nd one." So there is only one left. Donald Trump says to the 7-year-old girl, "I have lived a long life. You can take the next one." So the little girl says, "That’s ok; the 46th president took my backpack." Lol.
I got hit by a bus.
But the bus was my ex.
What keeps you breathing when you're on Earth?
I don't know. I suffocated at birth.
Memes
i need coffee where can i get some
A Chinese wise man once said, "ching chong ling long ting tong," which means, "keep striving in life."
Technoblade NPC: Gets removed from Minecraft!
Technoblade: Gets removed from real life!
Me: I’m gonna smite the life out of you!!!
Orphan: What! No! Please no!
Me: What you gonna do? Run home and tell your parents? Wait, I forgot, you don’t have a home or parents!!!!
What does 9 and 36 add up to?
A life in prison.
There was a man in a wheelchair, and he got knocked out in front of a bus. He had a wheelie good life!
Stephen Hawking tried to charge his phone and unplugged his life support.
What did the ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, it just waved.
I hate my life.
Life is like a game of chess.
I don’t know how to play chess.
Why did Technoblade die?
He couldn't respawn in real life!
My life, ha ha funny!
You know, life as a pufferfish is tough. They get startled, then they get hard.
Hey everyone, I'm back because I'm sinking back towards depression because my sister is really being a bitch, and my parents always side with her, and the stress over online school is just getting overwhelming, and I'm seriously considering hanging myself to end it all because the pain is just... terrible, and I feel like I'm not worth life.
How do you know if your wife is dead?
Sex is the same, but the dishes keep piling up.
One time, a cow saved my life.
It was bovine intervention.
The Stiggs life is a joke. Wait, I forgot, he doesn't have a life.