Life jokes
Q: Why was the 4 year old anti-vaxer crying?
A: He was in a mid-life crisis.
I was about to joke about your life, but I think your life is already a joke.
What does an orphan and a wheelchair have in common?
They can both be replaced.
What does an orphan's life and a pseudoword have in common?
They both have no meaning.
Life’s not a game... but if it was, some people would still be stuck on the tutorial.
Steven Hawking's death, you should've gotten a case.
What's the same about dark humor and kids with cancer?
They never get old.
Why couldn't the orphan have the bag of chips?
It was family size.
What's the difference between a skeleton and a baby? I don't set the skeleton on fire.
Why did the skeleton not go to the ball?
He had no-body to go with.
Me: "Oh man, things are really happening for me! I have so much to do!"
Depression: "Lie in bed."
Why did the orphan chase the family? Because he was jealous that he did not have a family.
"Buy a man an airplane ticket, he will fly once. Throw a man off an airplane and he will fly for the rest of his life."
- Sun Tzu
Remember kids, when you're angry, burn down an orphanage. Then they'll really be living the hard knock life.
What’s the hardest part about eating a vegetable in a wheelchair?
5+2 = 7
But 4+3 also = 7
So take your own path.
There was a deaf man. He was deaf. Ha, sucks for him! (sans undertale)
I hope Death is a woman.
That way, it will never come for me.
Everyone in my class: "I can't wait until I have a family, I can't wait to study for my dream job."
My friends: "What's your dream job?"
Me: "I'm going to die young :))"
What’s the difference between me and grass? Grass doesn’t cut itself.