Life jokes

Life is karma... because I was born, God gifted me with social awkwardness, sh*t athletic skills, and stupidity.

What’s the similarity between a broken pencil and my life? They’re both pointless.

Being an orphan isn’t all bad.

On the bright side, all your snacks are family sized.

Why did the orphan kill itself?

Because he's depressed about no family.

I hope death is a girl. That way, it'll never come for me.

Me, an orphan: *laughing at orphan jokes*

Some person: Stop laughing, it's sad to laugh at your pain.

Me, an orphan: That's the funny part, what am I going to do, tell my parents?

What's one advantage of being an orphan?

Nobody can make mama jokes about you. 🌚

Putin be like CSGO is much harder in real life!

Chalie has an eating disorder, and he is shorter, so is his life, but he will never get a wife. He's a gay motherfucker who wants to be hit by a trucker?

You know they're lying when they say, "My mom's picking me up."

I was spending my holiday in Paris with my gf. As we were walking near the city, a meteor hit and killed my gf.

Forensics did an autopsy on the corpse and concluded that someone missed a pen and hit my gf from the PSG training ground. SHAME ON YOU PESSI FOR RUINING MY LIFE! 🤬😡

I saw a little boy sitting on a curb wearing rags.

I said: "Aww, are you an orphan?"

And he responded with "Yeah. What gave me away?"

And I said: "Your parents."

Life is a bitch, and people make it worse.

This thing that I'm in ("am") is a forsaken curse (beta).

My life, but wait, jokes actually have meaning.

Me. I am the joke.

Quote of the day:

A bad attitude is like a flat tire. You can't go anywhere until you change it.

Chao!!!

Hello everyone! I just came back! How are things going?

What's the difference between an orphan and a dew?

One goes up and one goes down.

How do blind kids get punished?

By moving the furniture around the house.

Friend: How's it going?

Me: Good, things are good!

Parent: How are you?

Me: Oh, I'm fine!

Twitter: Compose new tweet?

Me: Hellooooo, I would like to tell you about my anxiety & my current greatest fears & let's talk about the impending apocalypse while we're at it.