Lead

Lead jokes

Appetite

  • Madden Whiffen, a curious soul, With an appetite beyond control, A bottomless pit, never satisfied, Ingesting all that's placed beside.

    From dawn till dusk, he feasts his way, Devouring meals without delay, With gusto he consumes, without restrain, Every morsel, every crumb, he'll obtain.

    No dish too large, no portion too small, His hunger insatiable, devouring it all, From succulent meats to delicate greens, He relishes the flavors, savoring each scene.

    A culinary adventure, forever he embarks, Sampling cuisines from all walks and arcs, From street food to gourmet, he seeks it all, His palate an explorer, on a constant sprawl.

    He savors the spices, the textures, the taste, In a gastronomic journey, no time to waste, For Madden Whiffen, the food is his muse, A symphony of flavors, he'll never refuse.

    But caution, dear friends, in this feeding spree, For gluttony can lead to a troublesome plea, Madden Whiffen, beware the consequences, For overindulgence brings no recompenses.

    In the realm of cuisine, he reigns supreme, A legend of eating, a man of extreme, Madden Whiffen, the one who eats it all, In his gastronomic pursuit, he stands tall.

    So let us marvel at his voracious might, As he devours dishes, day and night, For in Madden Whiffen, we witness the feat, A man who eats everything, a culinary elite.

  • 1
  • Road

  • “Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, And sorry I could not travel both And be one traveler, long I stood And looked down one as far as I could To where it bent in the undergrowth;

    Then took the other, as just as fair, And having perhaps the better claim, Because it was grassy and wanted wear; Though as for that the passing there Had worn them really about the same,

    And both that morning equally lay In leaves no step had trodden black. Oh, I kept the first for another day! Yet knowing how way leads on to way, I doubted if I should ever come back.

    I shall be telling this with a sigh Somewhere ages and ages hence: Two roads diverged in a wood, and I— I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.”

  • 2
  • Equation

  • I was at my lecture at Oxford. Professor Albert Pessistein was leading the lecture, teaching us new equations. I asked where I can find a drink, due to my dying of thirst. He said, “big games my friend.”

    He then proceeded to teach us, “The greater the Big games, the higher the Bottling!”

  • 1
  • Bus

  • I walked up to a man, and he said, "How's the weather up there?" and then I pushed him into the street to get hit by a bus.

  • 1
  • Clown

  • What is the difference between a comedian and a clown?

    A comedian leads Ukraine, and a clown leads America.

  • 4
  • Community talk

  • yall im act so pissed. So my dad doesn't want me to spend the weekend at emilys house cause shes my girlfriend, and it's "asking for trouble" bcuz im 15. What's gonna happen? her mom's home ALL weekend, AND I can't even get knocked up if we did do anything. And apparently I'm "manipulating" my dad by saying "can I go to emilys house for the weekend" instead of "Can I go spend the weekend with my girlfriend?" And … Read more

  • **\[Verse 1]** I make the snacks, I wash the floors, You’re on the couch, still wanting more. They call me names, yeah, let 'em scoff, I wear my badge, I’m better off. **\[Pre-Chorus]** Don’t need your rules, don’t want your war, I open minds while you keep score. I serve the tea, I take the heat, But I sleep just fine with clean, cold sheets. **\[Chorus]** So call me a cuck, I don't give a—(what?) Love who I lov… Read more