When you accidentally choke your girlfriend to death and then realize that it's your sister so who gives a f**k?
A police officer said to a belly button, "You're under a-vest."
What do you call a pillow that has been on the bed for 20 years in jail?
A criminal! 😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃
Your Mom tells you to take out the trash, and the next day the Police are asking if you bombed the School.
What does Jeffrey tell his white teens?
You want to take it orally or through anal? Joke, I'm not asking.
Why did the person go to jail?
He committed a crime.
Guys, you know any best rape roleplay? (I'm a guy, btw.)
You can't put an orphan on house arrest if there isn't a house to arrest them to.
Killing someone is better than killing yourself.
Why can’t you yell at a kid?
Because the cops are after you.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Fishes.
Fishes who?
Fishes the police, come out with your hands up!
My friend walked down the street and peed on a car.
Here’s what I did to the kids at the orphanage. I dropkicked 12, lit 10 on fire, comboed 9, punched 3, and murdered 1.
Why can’t girls in the Middle East smoke weed?
Because they’ll get stoned.
It's illegal to go onto someone's property, demand money that they might not have while wearing all black, and threaten horrible things if they don't pay.
But when the IRS does it, it's perfectly fine. HMMMMM . . .
The woman was thinking she wanted to have sex, but one second later, she did it on the street with a criminal.
What is red, white, and blue all over?
A dead cop.
Why didn't R. Kelly go to Germany to fuck teens? The legal age there is 14...Like bro hop on a plane and fuck a 14 year old hooker!
I will always remember my grandpa's last words after robbing a bank: "Oh, shit! The pigs are catching up!" But the cops did not kill him; he drove full speed off a cliff.
What does a middle aged man live in?
A retarded kid he keeps in the van.
