Law jokes
Hit 'em with the 1, 2, Jeffery Dahmer!
And Mary said God had given her a child, so Joseph went and joined Fathers For Justice.
What does a cop say when they shoot ginger?
"Orange is the new black."
Two whores are watching the sun come up, splitting a bottle of Mad Dog and celebrating another night of servicing the general public. One asks the other: "Say. You ever been picked up by the fuzz?"
Her friend thinks it over, "No...but I have been swung around by the tits a few times!"
I'm required by law to tell you I am a registered sex offender.
me to fake acc
People should've recognized that Jared Fogle was a sick offender by one coded Subway sandwich; he normally claimed to kids he ate the sweet onion chicken teriyaki when it was the tuna sub.
Tuna sub was the message of the target to the kid since "tuna sub" put together makes "tunasub" and the truth comes when you spell it in reverse ("busanut")!
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, because they beat the room for being dark, then arrest the room for being broke.
House parties are like churches: there's always an underage kid getting fucked somewhere.
If you get a divorce with your husband, does that still mean you’re siblings?
Why did the pillow go to court?
Because it had a pillowcase!
Why was the sheep arrested?
Because he did a "ewe" turn on a motorway.
What do you get when you cross a pedophile and an elementary school? Predator 3.
Someone threw a cup at my eye. I told 911 that I was mugged.
My mom always said garlic powder makes everything better, so I sprinkled some on my divorce papers and my wife's broken leg.
Hey, 2nd Amendmenters! Wanna know what gun Jesus used during his time?
What?
A nail gun!
Why can't orphans be criminals?
Because they're not wanted.
I drove through a school zone and found out you can drag a speed bump 😬.
Why did the orphan rob the bank?
Because he/she wanted to be wanted!
If there are 4 Mexicans in a van, which of them is driving?
None of them. Immigration service is.
Why did the orphan rob a bank?
To be wanted.