Yesterday in my dream I ate a ten pound marshmallow, when I woke up my pillow was gone
Most people smother babies with love. I smother them with pillows
What did the pillow say as it fell off the bed?
My wife told me I was immature. I just told her to get out of my pillow fort.
Why did the silly girl 👧 put sugar under her pillow?
She wanted to have sweet dreams. 😂
Why did the pillow go to court?
Because it had a pillowcase
Why did the plum put sugar under its pillow?
So it could have sweet dreams.
Have you heard about the corduroy pillow cases? They’ve been making headlines.
Mom: you need to grow up. your so immature
Me: glares get out of my castle …
Mom: it’s a pillow fort
Me: why cant i have an imagination!?
Mom: your almost 19 years old
Me: not good enough … OUT!
Q : What’s the similarity between a dog and a bed?
A : I can jump on my bed. A : And I use a pillow on both of them.
There were three boys on the top of a slide. The first one went down yelling “gold!” and landed in a pot of gold. The second boy went down and shouted “pillows!” and landed in a heap of pillows. The final boy went down and shouted “weeeeeeeee!”
Why did the pillow cross the road?
To get to a mattress store😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣😛😛😛🤩😤🥴
I dreamed I was forced to eat a giant marshmallow, but when I woke up my pillow was gone!
I had a dream about being forced to eat a huge marshmallow I woke up and my pillow was gone
You’re so short you could use a pillow as your bed and still have some wiggle room.
I farted try me you farted oh no we all farted
The plane crashed but I did too on a pillow
Why did the pillow cross the road
Because his cousins name was Koshin and he didnt want to live anymore
What do you call a pillow that been on the bed for 20 years in jail A criminal 😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃
We were so poor my dad would give me a penny not to eat supper. I’d put it under my pillow and while i was sleeping he would come in and take it. In the morning he would holler at me for loosing the penny.
What did one pillow say to the other? Nothing meah they just sang a song about a rogue chicken whose feathers had been sacrificed to make them.
What kind of pillow make Sounds
What do you call 2 homeless people throwing rocks at each other. “Pillow Fight”.
What does a pillow say when you live for a week don’t forget me
Why did Chad date the 9 yr old
Because Stellas hot
My women told me that she wants to have sex with me and I said let’s go at it and she said shit up and kiss me on all my pillow