Did you guys see on the news where they arrested that pervert at the Michaels Crafts store?
He was running around completely naked and had sprinkled glitter all over his testicles. I guess it was pretty nuts.
9/11... 911... COINCIDENCE I THINK NOT!
A lady runs into a police station and yells, "Help, help! I've been graped!"
A police officer says, "Do you mean raped?"
The girl then replies, "No, there was a bunch of 'em!"
Why were Helen Keller's hands crippled?
From reading stop signs at fifty miles per hour.
What do you call a racist crow?
Jim.
What's the best part of being a pedophile? You will never have a wife.
I didn't know I raped her. I thought she wanted me to hurry up.
Why is reverse cowgirl banned in Alabama? Because you never turn your back on family.
My doctor told me, "Time heals wounds."
So I stabbed him.
Now we wait...
They say watching child porn will get me 20 years in jail. I prefer to think of it as two 10-year-olds.
A depressed man was caught on top of the Empire State Building with marijuana. Needless to say, he didn't want to come down.
Why did Michael Jackson go to jail? He was feeling a little Randy.
EatDatPussy445, aka Deyione Scott-Wilson Eason, aka Bryant Turman Emerson Moreland, is a pedophile, and he is in Las Vegas right now. Go, go, go, catch him!
Why did the orphan rob the bank?
So they could be wanted.
In heaven, the Englishman is responsible for jokes, the Italian man for food, and the German man for law and order. In hell, the Englishman is responsible for food, the Italian man for law and order, and the German man for jokes.
Hi, everyone. Serious question. Would it be illegal to decapitate a worm? Asking for a friend, he's so worried we're going to jail. I'm not. I'm fine. Please reply fast.
A child is determined to burn his home down. His dad watched, tears in his eyes. He put his arm across the mother and stated, “That’s arson.”
Officer, I drop-kicked that child in self-defense!
You gotta believe me!
By the law, you are not allowed to have a sick bird. That's ill-eagle.
what do you call an autistic police officer? special forces
