Language jokes
Are butt cheeks one word, or should I spread them apart?
Asians love it when a British person says "Rice!"
I had an animal pun contest today. He started off by saying something. I don’t remember.
Then I replied, “TOUCAN play that game.” He went silent, and my other friend barged in and said, “Don’t you think he’s CHICKENing out?” I said, “Yeah, just stop HORSING around!” He came back with one, and I ended it by saying, “Ok, let’s MOOOOOve on cow.”
Welp, that’s it.
Why did the man say "hi ti bye?"
A dyslexic guy walks into a bra!
Why did the crows form a charity?
Because it's all for good caws!
What is a gay person’s favorite book?
The dictionary.
How do you call a man with no body and no nose? Nobody knows.
Q: If a cat says to a dog, "All dogs are liars," and the dog says to the cat, "All cats are liars," what does it mean?
A: It means cats and dogs can talk.
What's the smartest insect? A spelling bee!
Why can't a blind person eat fish?
They can't see food.
You are all going to be pun-ished!
Random guy: Do you know Dee?
Other dude: Who’s Dee?
Random guy: Dee Snuts!
How can you make a woman scream your name when you have sex with her?
Change your name to "Rape."
Do you know what I found in my letter soup? A space.
If you take a cap off a bottle, is it decapitation?
Sorry guys, I tried. I tried harder this time. I'll try again. Sorry, I can't delete things.
What time is your name from? Any time.
What's only book rapeboat ever read? Rhyming dictionary, he got no rhymes without it.
What do the names Alan and Jordan have in common?
An.
What is the difference between a rapist and a dictionary?
One of them knows the definition of no.