Language jokes

Why can't Asian people use a telephone?

Because they might wing the wrong number.

What language do they speak in the middle of the earth?

CORE-ean

Why’s BBC called BBC?

The dude’s shlong gets bigger every time he says n-

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his mom said, "Ven bakac."

I submitted 10 puns to see if they'd make this list.

But no pun in ten did.

Spanish is difficult. When my mom gives me food, she says "toma," and that's drink in English, so I always drink my food.

Knock knock!!

Who's there??

Dishwasher!!

Dishwasher who??

Dishwasher way i used to talk when i got my head kicked in!

The F in "I'm orphan" stands for family.

But there is no F.

What does the "f" in "orphan" stand for? It stands for family.

"Knock, knock."

"Who's there?"

"Who."

"Who who?"

"Why are you who-ing like an owl?"

Hey, can you hold this for a second?

Yahahlmsyw.

That stand for:

You are has a whole, let me show you why.

Yesterday I saw a guy spill all his Scrabble letters on the road.

I asked him, “What’s the word on the street?”

Those were a-mug-zing jokes. They were Mugderful, and Mugjestic.

What do you call a failure in another language?

Me.

Do you know Bumo?

Bumo deez nuts.

So there was this girl and her horse would not stop following her, so she said, "Stop horsing around!"

Get it? "Horse-ing."

SOOOO my sister said her first bad word yesterday. "Shit." My mum was like, "What did you just say, child?"

Sister: "I said the cat shits inside like the dog shi- uh oh......"

Now I've avoided this stuff by making my own word: Sugarplum. Sugarplum = shit...

My sister made some pie, and it tasted horribly... so I said this.... "This pie is very sugarplum-y." She said, "What do you mean by that?" I said, "It tastes like sugarplums..."

How do paedophiles greet people?

"How are you, kid?"

Why can’t English people play chess? They ain't got no queen.