Kid jokes

What's a depressed kid's least favorite game?

Cut the rope.

The school shooter points the gun at the emo kid. While the shooter tries to shoot him, the emo kid dodges the bullets like in the Matrix and takes the gun away from the shooter and shoots himself.

What is a fun game for an emo kid?

Tug-o-war with a tree.

When you have to fight an emo kid, but he brings his friends, so you gotta fight the Suicide Squad. But you gotta get the boys to help you.

The smartest kid in my class says "is-land" instead of "island."

Kid on Xbox: I'm not a virgin. Ask your sister.

Bully on Xbox: I don't have a sister, dumbass.

Kid on Xbox: You will in 9 months.

What do blind kids and orphans have in common? I fucking hate their whiny asses and beat them up.

Kid: Why is Pluto a dwarf planet?

Kid 2: Why?

Kid: 'Cause it's as short as your dick.

White 40 year olds love little white kids, and so does Trump! The biggest hands to touch the kids and his daughter!

Kid: Hey, why am I an orphan?

Adult: I don't know, ask your parents.

I can smell your kids!

I am looking for a Robert "Jamie" Weber. He is a friend of mine from 3rd grade that welcomed me as the new kid. I am currently in 6th grade going into 7th grade (summer brake).

What’s the bravest thing a man can do?

Say, “I’m going to get milk!” to his wife and kids.

This mute kid was getting made fun of. I told him to speak up for himself.

Brits don't exist. Mummies can't have kids.

Why have kids? Just go get one now, no nine-month delay.

My builder was extending my basement when he questioned me because he found three dead kids in a corner tied together.

Kid: Dad, where do you work?

Dad: I.C.U.P.

Kid: HAHAHAH!!!! See you pee.

Yesterday I had a party.

I got questioned about five dead kids locked up in a box.

I did that when I was 13. Damn, I forgot about them!

One day I told a kid what 2 x 12 was. He said he didn't know. I said let's go to my basement and figure it out. He is still in my basement trying to do the equation.