Joke jokes
What’s the difference between depression and your ex?
Depression fucks you harder.
"Déjà moo": The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
Two husbands walk into a bar.
The first one says, "My wife is an angel."
The second one says, "You're lucky, mine is still alive."
Why did the orphan sleep outside? ... Because he gets to wake up to Mother Nature.
Your hairline looks like someone tried to erase it using Microsoft Paint.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water, but Jill fell down and Jack came tumbling down after.
(And you thought this would be a joke.)
I can find the end of time before I find your hairline.
You're so skinny, you could travel through a fax!
What's the only good thing about being an orphan?
All snacks are family sized!
What's the best part about a dead hooker? The second hour is free!
Why is a sick person and California similar? They tend to burn up.
If you're depressed and you're crying, like this joke.
Why didn't Logan Paul high five the Asian man? Because he loves to leave Asians hanging.
My sister asked me what is dark humor. I asked what does a cannibal call a pregnant woman? "Kinder Surprise!"
How do you stop a baby from drowning?
-Lift up your foot.
One day I was walking around, then saw this mom mad at her kid and screamed, "You're adopted!" He said, "Yeah, I know. My REAL mommy is still at home with daddy."
What do you say to an upset Down syndrome person? "What's bringing you down?"
What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection?
Quarter pounder with cheese.
What part of the Earth does Helen Keller not have?
The sea.
A man died and went to heaven. Every time you cheat, you get a worse car.
The first man cheated 5 times; he got a Jeep. The second man cheated 3 times; he got a BMW. The third man never cheated; he got a Lamborghini.
The second man saw the third man sad. He said, "Why are you sad?" The third man said, "I saw my wife with a scooter."