Joke jokes
Do you know the TV show "Naked and Afraid?" Well, that's what my grandpa and I played when I was young.
Yesterday my daughter was playing in the garden when I saw her kill a butterfly. I told her that, as a punishment, she won't eat butter for 1 month.
Today I saw her killing a cockroach in the kitchen. I told her "nice try".
Why did the rape victim think it was Christmas?
Because her clothes were torn off like wrapping paper.
What part of the Earth does Helen Keller not have?
The sea.
A man died and went to heaven. Every time you cheat, you get a worse car.
The first man cheated 5 times; he got a Jeep. The second man cheated 3 times; he got a BMW. The third man never cheated; he got a Lamborghini.
The second man saw the third man sad. He said, "Why are you sad?" The third man said, "I saw my wife with a scooter."
Memes
bro fr wanted to call just for this (bros drunk lol with his friends)
What’s the best thing about 28 year olds?
There’s 20 of them.
Q. Two gay guys are having sex, when suddenly the house catches fire. Who gets out of the house first, the guy on top or bottom?
A. The guy on the bottom because he already has his shit packed.
What's the a simulation between a penis and a Rubik's cube?
The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell them to clap until their parents come home.
Q. How much cum does a gay guy have?
A. A butt load.
Q: What do you call it when four Mexicans drown in quicksand?
A: Cuatro Cinco.
What is the difference between a baby and a trampoline?
I take off my boots when I jump on a trampoline.
What do you call a Chinese man in the heat?
Boi Ling.
How do you get 500 babies in a phone booth?
A blender.
How do you get them out?
A straw.
I am about to make a joke about cake. You butter believe it.
A farmer walks up to his farmer neighbor with a jug of milk. The farmer says, "I milked your cow." The neighbor replies, "I have a bull, not a cow."
Why couldn’t the toilet paper cross the road?
Because it was stuck in a crack.
What do you call a fish with no eye?
Fsh.
What's the difference between a pile of babies and a Porsche?
I don't have a Porsche in my garage.
What's the difference between a black dad and a boomerang? A boomerang comes back.