Joke jokes
What’s the difference between a chromosome and a hormone?
You can hear a hormone.
James: I have a joke. Sex!
Ronny: I don't get it.
James: Exactly.
What do you call a cute boy with Down syndrome?
Awwtistic.
How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
To get to the other side!
Why did Stephen Hawking die? He ran out of data.
Why was 10 afraid?
Because he was in the middle of 9/11.
Damn bro, are you Gold, Titanium, Sulfur, Titanium, and Carbon?
Cuz you be lookin AuTiSTiC.
I am a registered sex offender. I'm just playing, I'm not registered yet.
Your forehead is so big and shiny it looks like a solar field.
You can't say Hitler was a bad person. He did kill Hitler after all.
What do you call someone with an extra chromosome winning in a pool?
Posiedown.
What is the most difficult day in the ghetto?
Father's Day.
A man is driving down the road and runs over a rabbit. He slams on his brakes, gets out, and walks up to the flattened bunny. The bunny is obviously expired.
A passing car slams on its brakes and screeches to a halt. The driver of that car runs up to the bunny, pulls out an aerosol can, and sprays the bunny with the aerosol spray. The bunny jumps up, runs a few feet, then stops, turns around, and waves its paw at the two men. Runs away a few more feet, stops, turns around, and waves at the two men. Runs away a few more feet, stops, turns around, and waves at the two men. He continues to do this until he’s out of sight.
The first driver looks at the man with the aerosol can and says, “Wow, that is amazing! What is in that can?” The man looks at the can and reads the label, “Hair restorer, with a permanent wave.”
How many fingers am I holding up?
Said the suicide bomber, referring to the countdown.
How do we know that the ocean is friendly? It waves.
Guys, we shouldn't make jokes about 9/11. My dad was a victim.
He was the best pilot in Arab.
A limbless man sat on the side of a lake every day. He had no hands or legs.
One day he was crying when a woman was walking by and saw that he was upset, so she asked if he was okay. He replied, "No."
The woman said, "Well, what's wrong?"
The limbless man said, "I've never been hugged by anyone ever."
So the woman, out of kindness, hugged the man. "Are you okay now?" she asked.
"No," the man replied. So again the woman asked him what was wrong. He answered, "I've never been kissed before."
The woman eagerly gave him a peck on the lips and asked, "Are you okay now?"
The man shook his head sadly. The woman asked him what was wrong for the third time. The man said, "I've never been fucked."
The woman looked at him, picks him up, throws him in the lake, and says, "Now you are!"
Papa John's pizzeria and abortion clinic. You make 'em, we bake 'em.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
She had no arms. "Knock knock." Who's there? Not Sally.
What did Trump rename the Presidential plane?
Answer: Hair Force One!