Joke jokes
Knock knock. Who's there? Parents. Parents who? That's what an orphan would say.
Q: Do you know why transgender people are good at being carpenters?
A: Because they have more experience cutting off their wood.
Lemme treat you like I treat my homework: slam you on my desk and do you all night.
After a suicide joke say, "Don't leave me hanging, or I'll cut it out."
What’s green and yellow and eats at your nuts?
Gonorrhea.
What do you call two gay Irishmen?
Patrick Fitz Gerald, and Gerald Fitz Patrick.
What do alcoholics and necrophiliacs have in common?
They both like cracking open a cold one.
What's the best way to get gum out of your hair?
Cancer.
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his wife?
He wiped.
I pushed the kid in the wheelchair down the hill, but before I did, I set his wheels on fire and called him "hot wheels."
Q: What is a lesbian's version of a cock block?
A: A beaver dam.
What does a pedophile mostly pound on a piano?
A minor.
Friend: "UR LIT BRO!!"
Me: "That's what my sleeve said to my arm."
I don't understand why people get offended by incest jokes; they're so family friendly.
I guess making 9/11 jokes at the airport is better than shouting "He's got a gun!" at the airport.
What's the difference between a good joke and a bad joke? Timing.
Do you have a shovel? Because I'm digging that ass.
What do you call Adolf Hitler in a pool? Adolfin.
Kid: "Dark humor is like a mother's love."
Orphan: "How?"
Kid: "You wouldn't know."
Orphan: "........."
My mom asks, "How did you do this?" Me: "Naw, I did it with a fork. WHAT D'YA THINK?-"