Joke jokes
What's the best way to get gum out of your hair?
Cancer.
Knock knock. Who's there? Parents. Parents who? That's what an orphan would say.
I just wanted to say to never let go of family; they are everything. Never let anyone walk all over you. And if you are with me, like this quote.
What’s worse than George Bush doing 9/11? Jeffrey Epstein doing nine Elevens.
Me: I look up to you.
Friend: Wow, thanks!
Me: But in general cuz your so tall.
Memes
Your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory.
Q: What is a lesbian's version of a cock block?
A: A beaver dam.
I was driving and accidentally hit a crippled kid. They were still breathing, so I told them to walk it off.
It's not funny to joke about orphans. Without any education, they'd never understand what the jokes mean.
Can we stop talking about 9/11? My dad died, man, but he was a good pilot.
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome on the beach?
A baked potato.
Your hairline looks like the McDonald's sign M.
My friend was feeling low today, so I went up to her and said, "You know, I would hang in there if I was you, swaying through life." I don't think she likes me now.
9/11 jokes are the bomb.
What do a relationship and suicidal thought have in common? They’ll both end soon.
Friend: Stop with the self harm jokes, they're not funny.
Me: It's not that deep. I'll cut it out.
Why do kids prefer to spend more time with their dad than their mom?
They already know that their dad is gonna get "Milk" and never return.
What's the difference between intelligence and apathy?
I don't know! I don't care!
A grasshopper jumps into a bar.
The bartender says, "We've got a drink named after you."
The grasshopper says, "Seriously? Why would you name a drink Callum?"
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