Joke jokes

I tried to catch the fog, but I mist.

It's all shits and giggles till somebody giggles and shits.

My girlfriend keeps calling me a pedophile. That’s a big word for a six-year-old.

What do you call a depressed group of kids?

Suicide squad.

How do you get an emo out of a tree? You cut the rope.

I know a woman who owns a taser. -- She's stunning!

What is a cannibal's favorite food?

Crackers.

What do you call a bear with extreme mood swings? -- A bi-polar-bear.

I was gonna tell a dead baby joke, but I decided to abort.

PP almighty stabeth thy! Then my sister said, "Just put it in."

What's the difference between you and eggs? Eggs get laid.

An American and an Asian walk into a bar. What are your names? the bartender asks. The American says, "William Matthews." The Asian says, "Same Ting."

What do you call Hitler in a pool? Adolfin.

What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?

The snowballs.

Want to hear a joke about prostitution?

Never mind, it's whoreable :)

This is not even a joke, it's a serious question... Is eating ass considered cannibalism?

What did one twin tower say to the other? "Be back, I gotta catch a plane."

Why can’t the employee tell dirty laundry jokes?

Because they always come out clean.

Have you seen the new movie Constipation?

You haven't?

That's because it hasn't come out yet.

What do teen mothers and their unborn babies have in common?

They're both thinking "Oh my God, my mom's gonna kill me!"