Joke jokes

One day, a priest loses his cock (chicken). He goes to the church and says, "Who has seen a cock?" All the women raised their hands. "No, who has seen a cock that is not theirs?" Half the women's hands went up. "No, no, no, who has seen my cock?" All the nuns' hands went up.

What's the best thing about Alzheimer's?

You can hide your own Easter Eggs!

Guys, stop making jokes about orphan's parents.

Who will be told? Oh wait.

What do you call a white girl having a seizure? A vanilla shake.

I would tell you a joke about unemployed people, but they don’t really work.

What happens when you make an asían girl squirt?

She charges you 10 cents for extra sauce.

I named my horse Mayo.

Mayo neighs.

If Stephen Hawking is dying, where do I take him, Currys PC World, or a hospital?

billie: hi.

me: You wanna hear a story?

billie: Yes, sure.

me: Once upon a time, I ran over your dog last night.

What do you call an autistic kid with a glock?

Special forces.

Btw, I'm 13.

Better call NASA and tell them there are only going to be 7 planets after I destroy URANUS.

I tried to catch the fog, but I mist.

It's all shits and giggles till somebody giggles and shits.

What do you call a depressed group of kids?

Suicide squad.

How do you get an emo out of a tree? You cut the rope.

What is a cannibal's favorite food?

Crackers.

What do you call a retard in a house fire?

Flame Retardant.

What do you call a bear with extreme mood swings? -- A bi-polar-bear.

I was gonna tell a dead baby joke, but I decided to abort.

What's the difference between you and eggs? Eggs get laid.