INS jokes
What do you call a person in America that is not a retard?
A foreign exchange student.
I put my uncle's ashes in my Taco Bell so he could tear my ass up one more time.
Why is America the fastest readers?
They went through 89 stories in 7 seconds.
Why was 10 afraid?
He was in the middle of 9/11.
Q. What do you call a rich person who is in a vegetative state?
A. A loaded potato.
The Bingles
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
RX XD INBOUND!
What do you call a terrorist in a bath?
A bath bomb.
Question: What is the difference between a morbid joke and a dark joke?
Answer: One is 10 babies in a trash can; the other is a baby in 10 trash cans.
To teach kids about democracy, I let them vote on dinner. They picked tacos. Then I made pizza because they do not live in a swing state.
Yo mama's armpits are so hairy, it looks like she's got Buckwheat in a headlock.
What begins in F and ends in UCK?
Fire truck.
POV: The quiet kid starts playing "Pumped Up Kicks" in the parking lot before school.
:me😐
The only woman to ever tell you that they loved you was your mom. (If she even loved you in the first place.)
The skeleton cancelled the gallery showing of his skull-ptures because his heart just wasn’t in it.
What do a doctor and a girlfriend/boyfriend have in common?
They both break your heart.
Q. What's the difference between fucking a coma patient and fucking a cabbage?
A. You have to cut a hole in the cabbage.
If 6 was afraid of 7 because 7 ate 9, then why was 10 afraid?
Because 10 was in the middle of 9/11.
What do you call a pillow that has been on the bed for 20 years in jail?
A criminal! 😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃
In the cute fantasies: "Est-ce que tu manges du poulet? Attendez une seconde, VOTRE PROFESSEUR VEGAN!!!!!"
In reality: "Are you eating chicken? Wait a second, YOUR THE VEGAN TEACHER!!!"
Like if you are in high school and miss school!