Incident jokes
My dad died in 9/11, and that was the second worst thing that happened to me with a plane, next to Soul Plane.
Every 911 joke isn't that good.
Well, at least not until they come crashing down.
Why are school shootings branded “very American”?
1. They usually happen in the USA.
2. They’re like the Fourth of July: there’s a lot of loud banging and kids screaming.
I told a 9/11 joke to my friends today.
It didn't land well.
One day, little Johnny was playing with his toys and looked out the window. He saw the neighbor's kid laying face-first in the grass, not breathing.
Little Johnny continued to shoot his nerf gun at the neighbor's big booty cheeks. No movement at all. After little Johnny went to get a snack, he looked out the window again and the kid was gone.
Little Johnny went to the neighbors and said, "I'm sorry to hear that your child has gone missing."
When I got to school, they gave me an Acer laptop, so I went up to the teacher and aced her.
I saw some twins, so I threw a paper plane at them.
Plane crash in China... pilots names released in the incident are as follows:
Sum Ting Wong.
Wei Toh Low.
Ho Lee Fuk.
Ban Din Ouch.
What's the best thing about 9/11 jokes...
They make you collapse with laughter because the Twin Towers collapsed.
So yesterday, I was at an orphanage, harassing children by twerking at them.
They burst into tears.
I was worried that they would call their mom, well... um... I got away.
Up into the sky so very far, here comes Dr. Seuss! "ALLAHU AKBAR", at the ripe old age of 97, he committed 9/11.
So you're in a hospital, you barely survive your suicide attempt. You see one of the scalpels, you finish the job.
I got caught peeing in the pool.
The lifeguard blew his whistle so hard I nearly fell in!
Did you know Princess Diana was on the radio the night she died?
To be honest, she was on the whole dashboard too.
Will Smith's slap was like 9/11. It came in unexpectedly and will go down in history.
Who are the fastest readers?
9/11 victims.
Why did the people in 9/11 not call 911? Because it would call the pilots.
RIP Harambe.
Lionel: Leona, please no more singing your annoying Fuzzy Bear song!
Leona: But I love my song, right Fuzzy?
Fuzzy Bear: I am going to bite you for not letting your sister sing my song!
*Fuzzy Bear bites Lionel*
Lionel: AHHHHHHH
Your mom is so ugly, she's the reason he swerved.