Humor
Bully: My d*ck is longer than your password.
Me: Sorry mate, it's so short, get a longer one! 🤣
Q: What is Hitler's least favorite grocery store?
A: Jew-Osco
Why does the large dildo not have any friends?
He's a pain in the ass.
What did one aborted baby say to the other? Nothing. They're both dead.
A guy walks into a bar with a revolver and yells, "WHO THE F*** F***ED MY WIFE!" A man in the back responds, "YOU AIN'T GOT ENOUGH BULLETS MATE!"
What do you call an orphan with parents?
Idk, I never met one before.
Bonus joke: I went up to an orphan and asked where his parents were. He said, "I don’t have any." I said, "Wonder why."
Another bonus joke: Me: Hey. Orphan: Hey. Me: What do you do for fun? Orphan: Look for my parents. Me: Me, so they're not dead? Orphan: No, they just abandoned me.
More bonus: What do you call a homeless kid?
An orphan.
Last bonus: Why don’t orphanages teach kids about home?
Because they can’t find one.
lmao this is so funny, dark humor can be funny. Sorry, orphans!
Johnny, make a joke. The joke is you because Little Johnny has a sense of humor because you're an idiot.
What is stuck between a doorway?
Rebel Wilson.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Oliver.
Oliver who?
Oliver jokes don’t exist! 👹
Did you know victims of 9/11 are fast readers?
They went down 100 stories in 4 seconds.
If I had a sister with only 1 leg... wouldn't her name be I-Lean?
Give a man a match, he'll be warm for a while. But set a man on fire, he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
Why did Harry fall out of the boat?
Because he's hooked!
My dad and I were talking and my cat left the room.
So I said, "I guess she wasn't feline it."
My dad said, "You've got to be kitten me, that was purrfect!"
I said, "Literally."
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
What’s another term for a lesbian?
A vagetarian.
These are all really nice jokes, but here is one.
Boy: Spell ME.
Girl: M-E.
Boy: You forgot the D.
Girl: There is no D in ME.
Boy: Not yet.
Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
I have schizophrenia,
And so do I.
I love escalator jokes. There's not too many steps.
Hey, I just want to give a round of applause to Shooter McFly, single-handedly keeping the jokes section alive. Unappreciated, well, Shooter, one person here appreciates you, at least.