Orphan

An orphan goes up to someone. The guy says, "Where are your parents?"

The orphan says, "Why do you think I'm wearing ripped pyjamas?"

Memes

Skeleton

Sans: Hey Frisk, why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?

Frisk: Why didn't he go to the dance?

Sans: 'Cause he had no body to dance with!

Wife

My wife called me ugly, and then when she found out how much money I actually make, she called me ugly and broke.

Tragedy

Why is the sinking of Titanic different to sinking rapboat?

Titanic sinking was a tragedy, rapboat sinking is fucking funny.

Dog

Why is a rap boat like a dog?

They both get off sniffing assholes.

Fish

One fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish.

I’m breaking up with you, bitch.

Mama

Yo mama so fat that when she pooped, poop exploded everywhere!

Terrorist

Why did the terrorist masturbate and smoke weed on the plane?

He was told to high-jack it.

Ass

Why do asses make the best detectives?

They always crack the case!