Humor
What do you call a skeleton's omelet?
A bonelet.
What did the calculator say to the student?
You can always count on me.
What do you call a 96-year-old who can still masturbate?
Miracle Whip.
What's the difference between a baby and a salad?
Most people don't get angry when you toss a salad.
I went to a girl and I said, "DEEZ NUTS!"
Best friend *holds a sign up that says "what gender are you?"*
Me: Uh, male?..
Best friend *then unfolds paper so it reads "what gender are you attracted to?"*
Me: You silly goose.
*Silence for like three seconds*
Me: Still male though-
What's the difference between a cop car and a hedgehog?
With a cop car, all the pricks are on the inside.
Lol, these jokes have been heard millions of times.
I AM SFLUGO FOUNDER OF THE PRO ORPHAN JOKE CLUB. Just want to say that people spamming does nothing and we will keep making our jokes!! #SaveOrphanJokes and please say in the comments if you want to join the club.
What is the best whey to make friends with an American boy, you bunch?
Why did the skeleton not go to the party? Because he had no body to go with.
What did the cancer patient get for Valentine's Day? Candy wigs.
If sex with three people is called a threesome and sex with four people is called a foursome, I guess now it's clear why everyone calls me handsome.
Hi, I'm a skeleton and I know a skele-TON of jokes!
Do you have a shovel in your back pocket?
Why?
'Cause I’m digging that ass.
What do a coin and an Irish man have in common?
They're both fun to flip off.
What did one butt cheek say to the other?
"Together we can stop this shit!"
Two men were talking about their wives. The first man says, "My wife is an angel." The second man says, "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
What’s the similarity between my dick and my girlfriend?
I beat both of them.
A white dude walks up to a Muslim and says, "So you're an Indian?" and the Muslim says, "No brotha, I'm not 7-Eleven, I'm 9/11."