Humor
I put the sexy in dyslexia.
Why do dwarfs love penis? It tickles their insides.
What is white and 9 inches?
Nothing.
Why did the dwarf get a job at Lidl?
Because every Lidl helps.
Have you heard of Imagine Dragons (the band)? Imagine dragging these nuts across your face.
What is a woman's name with one leg?
Eileen.
Question: "You're-a-American" when you're not in the restroom and when you come out of the restroom. What are you when you're in the restroom?
Answer: European (You're-a-peein')
Stop complaining. Pedophile jokes are pretty funny, but to say there are over 100 of them only to have repeats of the same joke told by different people is very disappointing.
These jokes are a little too explosive, if you ask me.
What do you call five Black people having sex?
Threesome.
My wife slept with another man and got pregnant. She told me 9 weeks later. I said it's ok and told her let's talk downstairs, so I pushed her down the stairs.
A high school student and his best friend were rushing to class after his best friend caused them both to be late. His best friend asked, "Would you like to hear a joke?" "Sure," he replied. "What do you and your sister have in common?" "I don't know." "Because of me you're both late for your next period."
When you get a pop-up book of the Qur'an and it just explodes as soon as you turn the page XD.
Do you know what the secret is to have a smoking, hot body as a senior citizen?
Cremation.
Three men were going for a drive through the desert. An hour later, the car breaks down. They all take something from the car to keep themselves cool as they walk to the nearest gas station a few miles back.
One guy grabs a hand-held fan. Another guy grabs the jug of water. The last guy takes the car door off. About 15 minutes into walking, the other two are giving the one guy weird looks. Finally, one of them asks why he is taking the car door. The third guy just replies that whenever he gets hot he can just roll down the window.
When is a piece of wood made king?
When it's a ruler.
Why is there no phone in China?
Too many wings, too many wongs; might wing wrong number.
Orphan jokes are just hurtful, and that is all they are, so please stop.
Papyrus: Sans, your jokes are bad!
Sans: I don’t care; I got thick skin.
Me: I need a good roast.
My friend: Take me!