Humor
What do the initials BIBLE stand for?
"Bullshit In Book Lacking Evidence."
What do you call a skeleton with no bones? A boneless boy.
Why couldn't the skeleton go to the prom? Because he had no BODY to go with...
I could have said a skeleTON more jokes, but I think that might break your funny bone.
What do you call it when you get away with masturbating in the shower?
You got off clean.
"Wanna hear a construction joke?"
"Yeah, sure."
"Wait, I'm still working on it!"
Memes
Papyrus: You are so lazy, Sans!
Sans: Call me what you want. I got THICK SKIN!
Papyrus: Another bad joke and I'm finished with him!!
Frisk: HAHAHA
Papyrus: We are monsters. The awfulest kind!
Sans: To mess with us takes a lot of SPINE!!!
What did Hitler tell the eye doctor?
“I can na-zi.”
A young peasant coming from the field with his scythe on his shoulder notices an attractive young woman that was doing the laundry in a mountain stream, perched on some rocks near a waterfall.
The guy stops and leans against his scythe, fascinated by the young girl's beauty.
After minutes of watching her, she loses her balance, slips on a rock and falls all the way down, crushing her head on the white rocks.
Thoughtful, he puts his scythe back on his shoulder and walks away, saying to himself "Damn, another washing machine destroyed by limestone!"
I’ve got a joke about Alzheimers.
Um.
Oh no. I can’t actually remember it.
What do kids with cancer and cancer jokes have in common?
They never get old.
What do you call a girl skeleton dancing?
A bone-étit.
My friend told me an emo joke once, and I said, "Emo jokes aren't funny, cut it out!"
Dirty Joke: A boy fell in the mud.
Clean Joke: He took a bath with bubbles.
Dirty Joke: Bubbles was the girl next door.
"Don't forget you are what you eat," said one person. "Then I should eat a skinny person!" said the other.
What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
It's easy to roast beef.
Me.
The joke is me.
There are 5 cats on a boat, and 1 jumps off. How many are left?
Zero, they were copycats.
If you shit in a church, is it a holy shit?
Teacher: Why did you throw paper airplanes at the twin sisters?
Me: You wouldn't get it.
For dinner, this girl had noodles. The next day, she could not find her skinny sister. The mom said, "Your sister is dead!" sadly. The girl asked, "She was skinny, right?" The mom said yes. The sister laughed, "I ate her! That’s why the noodles were very skinny!"