Humor
A man walks into a bar, and there is a line of people waiting to punch him.
Yeah, that was the punchline.
Hellen Keller went to town riding a pony, stuck a feather in her hat, and called it an "Unnghhtpthhh!"
Popular guy in class: I am so funny.
Me: Your parents are funny as they made a joke and people are still laughing at it.
What's the difference between Clark Kent and chicken noodle?
One is Super. The other is just soup.
I don't like calculator jokes because they are too overused.
Memes
What's the difference between blood and an orphan? Blood has a place in all of our hearts.
I told an orphan that I watch Family Guy, and he seemed disappointed, so I reminded him that he has no family.
Me: Wanna hear a joke?
Person: Sure.
Me: Never mind, I was gonna say my life, but my life isn't a joke! Jokes have meaning.
Person: Dear God...
What do you call it when a guy named Fred enters Panera Bread?
Panera Fred.
What’s the difference between an orphan and Pikachu?
Pikachu, I choose you!
What did the frog do when his car broke down?
It was toad.
How are genders and the Twin Towers alike?
There was 2, now it's a sensitive subject.
The dark side of kid songs:
You got a friend in me... you got a friend in me!
Your breasts remind me of Mount Rushmore – my face should be among them.
What’s Queen Elizabeth’s pickup line?
You’re breathtaking!
Your hairline is so bad, when people see the back of your head they say "nice beard!"
"Thank God there are no of these ahahha ya thank God to pranks."
"Oh I forgot a dance 🕺 😅 joke is good ok for kids."
A married woman asked her husband if he saw the future. The husband answered her, "I have no eye, dear."
What's black and sits at the top of the stairs?
Stephen Hawking during a house fire.
What's the difference between Monday and a dick?
They're not different. They're both unnecessarily long and hard.